From the Cutting Room Floor
by memnarch
Summary: Reality shows don't always show you everything. But that's what deleted scenes specials are for! All canon pairings. Rated T for some mild language. R&R please.
1. The Real First Day

From the Cutting Room Floor

**Author's Note: Hi folks! I've recently become obsessed with TDI, so I **_**had**_** to start writing about it. To all the people who read my other fic, I'm sorry I haven't updated in a while. Midterms are coming up and it's been really hard to work writing in when I've finally gotten to see all the friends I missed over the summer. Why then am I choosing to write about Total Drama Island, you might ask? If you're wondering that, you obviously haven't seen Total Drama Island. Best. Cartoon. Ever. Watch it!**

**By the way, XXXXXXXXXX will indicate a camera cut.**

**Disclaimer**: I don't own TDI. If I did, I would really, _really_ enjoy my job.

Chapter 1: The Real First Day

"What's up viewers?" Chris Maclean smiled, perched on a folding director's chair in the center of Camp Wawanakwa's familiar grounds. "The first season of Total Drama Island may be over, but like many reality shows, we couldn't show you _everything_. Fitting all of our footage into half an hour every week isn't easy. But luckily for _you_, over the next few weeks, we'll be showing you all the exciting moments that didn't make the cut. So sit back and enjoy these…Total…_Drama_…Outtakes!"

XXXXXXXXXX

"Welcome back!" Chris greeted the camera with a wave. "As you might've noticed, the first episode of TDI only took place over the course of one day, while we usually filmed over the course of three days or so. That's because we _sort of_ edited it to save time. _Not_ to worry though! Those first two days and many more exciting moments are here now for your viewing pleasure! Now, we pick up right after our campers have had a little run in with a cockroach!"

XXXXXXXXXX

"They always go for the jocks," Duncan smirked, rolling his eyes at Tyler and Lindsay's touching moment.

"Where'd you get an _axe_, punk boy?" Heather asked, pushing herself down from the bunk she'd been taking refuge from the cockroach on.

"Where do you think, Legs?" Duncan sneered, hefting the hatchet and turning to go.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Seriously? Who packs an axe?" Heather said haughtily, crossing her arms and staring into the confession cam.

XXXXXXXXXX

"It was _awesome_!" Harold exulted into the camera, running his hands through his hair in disbelief. "I wish I'd brought my mace now…then we could _battle_!"

XXXXXXXXXX

"Yeah, I stole it," Duncan shrugged, "So what? I _just_ got out of juvie! I have to get my groove back…"

XXXXXXXXXX

Back in the cabin, Gwen sighed. "Okay Muscles," she said to DJ, jerking her thumb over shoulder, "Off the bed, before it gets even more bent."

"Heh, heh, oops…" the burly camper chuckled sheepishly, hopping quickly off of the bed's sagging frame. "Let me fix that for you!"

"Wait, what are you-"

But Gwen's protestations were too slow to stop DJ as he leaned down and bent the wood back into its original shape with his bare hands.

"Whoa…that was just…_wow_…" Gwen said apprehensively, staring askance at DJ as he left the cabin.

XXXXXXXXXX

"And _that_ guy's _afraid_ of a _cockroach_?!" the pale girl asked the camera incredulously.

XXXXXXXXXX

Later, after Chris had called them all to the main cabin for what he and their intimidating chef assured them was food, the squint-eyed host addressed the campers. "Alright everyone! Now that you're all fed," he began, studiously ignoring the barely-touched slop on most people's plates, "why don't you take the rest of the day to explore the camp and the rest of the island?"

Everyone murmured their assent and began to file out. Tyler made the mistake of holding the screen door open for Eva, who immediately demanded that he explain himself. The unfortunate jock soon found himself opposite the well-built girl in an arm-wrestling contest with little idea how he got there.

XXXXXXXXXX

"I was just tryin' to be _nice_!" the hapless athlete wailed later in the confessional, nursing his sore hand.

XXXXXXXXXX

Meanwhile, as Noah and Ezekiel neared the door, they both felt a massive hand crush down on their shoulders. "And where d'you think _you're _goin', scrawny kids?!" Chef Hatchet boomed down at them.

"Uh…_outside_?" Noah drawled bravely, while Ezekiel nodded in agreement.

"I don't _think_ so!" Chef said, grinning sadistically. "I noticed that neither a' you boys so much as touched ya' food! And you're gunna' need all ya' strength to keep up with what Chris's got planned for you! I think I'll whip up somethin' _extra_ special for you boys…"

"I'm, uh, I'm really not hungry, eh," Ezekiel stuttered.

"I _WASN'T _ASKIN'!!!" Chef thundered at them, dragging the pair away.

XXXXXXXXXX

Outside, the other campers were splitting off.

"I'm going out on the water to see if I can catch any waves," Bridgette said, heading over to girls' side of the Bass cabin.

"Cool!" Geoff called after her, "Mind if I join you?"

"Uh…sure," Bridgette smiled shyly, "Just let me change into my suit."

"Sweet!" Geoff said, removing his shirt and tossing it into the boy's side.

As the blonde duo went off in search of a good wave, Justin strutted towards what passed for a beach to practice his modeling.

"Oh my God!" Katie and Sadie squealed simultaneously.

Katie turned to her chubbier almost-twin, "Are you thinking what I'm thinking Sadie?!"

Sadie nodded and both girls followed the island's resident hunk to the beach, giggling to one another.

"Ugh, _fangirls_…" Heather muttered scornfully, rolling her eyes.

"Well I say the rest of us go on a hike," Courtney suggested brightly to the remaining campers, "We should really get to know this place if we're going to be here for a while."

"Mmm, as fun as that _sounds_, I think I'll pass," the Gwen replied, heading in the direction of the Gophers' cabin.

"Yeah, me too," Trent said apologetically, "I had a really long flight and jet lag's starting to hit me." The hipster turned back to his cabin, yawning loudly.

"I like, _have_ to give myself a manicure!" Lindsay announced happily, skipping back to her cabin and passing her goth teammate, who gave the bubbly ditz a withering look. Gwen sighed and instead went off towards the campfire pit.

"I was thinking about goin' swimming!" Cody smiled, pointing cockily at the girls who were left, "Any of you ladies care to come along?"

"_Real_ smooth short stuff," Leshawna chuckled, "but no thanks."

"Heh, I'll go for a swim!" Owen said excitedly before twiddling his thumbs, "I'm not a very good swimmer though…"

"Learn by doing, my man. How do you think I'm so successful with the ladies?" Cody grinned, clapping his enormous companion on the back as they strolled off to get changed.

"Okay, so are we _doing_ this or _what_?" Courtney frowned, hands on hips.

"And who put _you_ in charge, Freckles?" Duncan asked, derision rife in his tone.

"No one!" Courtney said irritably, pursing her lips, "I just don't think we should all explore the island alone! There could be bears…or something!"

"Ha! _Bears_?" the piercing studded camper scoffed, "Yeah right! If you see one of those, let me know!"

"You're not going _either_?" Courtney huffed at the punk.

"Nah," Duncan replied, crossing his arms and glancing around at their rustic surroundings, "I'm sure I can find something a _lot_ more fun to do around here than have you try to _boss_ me around for a couple hours…"

"I am _not_ bossy!" Courtney said indignantly, as the rest of the campers looked on in amusement at the two's exchange, "If you don't want to come, _fine_! We'd probably be better off without you _anyway_. I'm going. If anyone else wants to come _with_ me…" She trailed off, striding towards the tree line.

DJ, Harold and Izzy all shrugged at one another and followed after her. Duncan grunted and loped away.

Their departure left Leshawna and Heather standing awkwardly in the middle of the camp.

"So, uh…Leshawna, was it?" Heather inquired, her tone friendly.

"Yeah, that's right!" Leshawna grinned, "Most folks just butcher my name! You're Heather right?"

"Uh-huh," Heather nodded, beaming back, "Listen, I was wondering…see, I saw this raft in the boat house earlier and I thought it'd be nice to take it on that river over there." She pointed at a patch of blue just visible between the trees.

"Why didn't you mention this _earlier_?" Leshawna asked suspiciously, her eyebrow raised.

"Um, duh!" Heather chided, "All _those_ guys were from the _other_ team. We're teammates! We have to stick together…"

"Oh, well sure then girl!" Leshawna smiled, looping her arm with her taller teammate's, "Let's explore the heck outta' that river!"

XXXXXXXXXX

"It's not like I _wanted_ to go out on that raft," Heather explained to the audience, "In _these_ shoes? But if I'm going to last in this game, I've got to know what's going on. And everyone knows that black girls are the biggest gossips…"

XXXXXXXXXX

As the four members of the Killer Bass made their way up a hill and farther into the woods, Courtney was surprised to see Duncan saunter up next to her.

"I thought you weren't coming on the hike," she mentioned offhandedly.

"I don't know what you're talking about," Duncan replied dismissively, "I just happen to be going this way."

"Are you always this difficult?" the brunette wondered, half to him and half to herself.

"Maybe."

"Errgh!" Courtney growled in frustration, stomping further ahead.

XXXXXXXXXX

"It's almost _too_ easy!" Duncan snickered later in the outhouse.

XXXXXXXXXX

Back in the now deserted camp, Beth exited the communal bathrooms, looking around confusedly.

"Hey…where'd everybody _go_?"

XXXXXXXXXX

"I don't know what you were expecting," Bridgette told Geoff as they waded out into the lake, "but I've only got the one board…"

"Hey, it's cool. We could take turns or whatever," Geoff replied easily, shrugging his shoulders.

"Um…I don't know how fun that would be…" the surfer said thoughtfully, "I mean, even if there are waves, one of us would just be watching the other. Why don't…why don't you come with me?"

"Uh, what?" Geoff asked, taken aback, "Like…like both of us on the board?"

"Yeah," Bridgette said, pushing her board down and climbing atop it, "I've done it plenty of times with my friends."

"Okay!"

Taking the hand his companion proffered him, Geoff clambered up next to her.

"So have you ever been surfing before?" Bridgette asked, paddling further out onto the lake.

"Naw," Geoff shook his head, "Just wakeboarding one time at the beach. And the waves weren't that bad."

"Well, surfing's totally different," the olive-eyed girl explained, "If a strong enough wave hits you, you'll go under and may not come back up."

"Whoa…sounds intense!"

"Oh it is! But…" Bridgette glanced around at the still lake around them, "I kind of doubt we'll be having _that_ kind of fun…"

"Well, look at it this way: now we have a chance to get to know each other," Geoff grinned, leaning forward.

"That's true…" the other blonde smiled back.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Geoff's really nice," Bridgette informed the camera, "At first I thought he was like the typical party guy, but he's really easy-going…"

XXXXXXXXXX

At that second, however, the couple's moment was interrupted by a loud bubbling emanating from beneath the lake's surface, followed by a rather pungent smell.

As both their noses scrunched up in disgust, a fish came floating stiffly up to the surface, which was soon snatched up by an eagle.

"Wow! An eagle totally just caught that fish!" Geoff marveled, scratching his head, "I've never seen an eagle before!"

"Me neither," Bridgette replied nasally, due to having pinched her nose to keep out the smell, "What's that horrible stench? You don't think there's a sewage plant around here do you? It'd be horrible if they were dumping into the lake…"

Geoff opened his mouth to respond, but was cut off as a cry rent the air.

"Agh! Dude, that is NASTY!" Cody yelled, leaping out of the water, onto the beach, and running off into the woods, his hands covering his nose.

"Wait! Cody come back!" Owen called, dog paddling towards the shore, "I'm just starting to get the hang of it!"

XXXXXXXXXX

"Yeah…so uh, turns out that Owen's swimming skills improved a lot when he found out farting made him go faster…" Cody explained later, shuddering at the memory.

XXXXXXXXXX

"And I owe it _all_ to Chef Hatchet's w-wonderful cooking…" the tubby Gopher said tearfully, dabbing his eyes.

XXXXXXXXXX

Elsewhere, the majority of the Killer Bass were traipsing through the woods when they came upon a fork in the path.

"Which way should we go guys?" DJ wondered, peering down the two trails.

"Let's take the right," Courtney said decisively, "The left one looks creepy…"

"Just 'cause it's scary, doesn't mean it couldn't be real cool," Harold spoke up.

"I hate to admit it, but Four Eyes here _has_ a point," Duncan agreed.

"Well, I'm not going down there!" Courtney refused stubbornly, "I'm _not_ going to fall into a ravine or something on my first day here."

"I…uh…I think I'll take the right one too…" DJ gulped.

"Whatever," Duncan sighed.

"Very well," their spectacled teammate replied, drawing himself up, "There are some things a man must do…_alone_."

And with that, the nerd marched off down the left path, humming to himself.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Every warrior must complete a test of bravery and stuff."

XXXXXXXXXX

"What are you doing?!" Courtney shouted after him, "We _need_ to stick together!"

"Forget it, girl," DJ said, putting a hand on her shoulder, "He's gone."

"Speaking of which…" Duncan said looking around, "Where'd that orange-haired chick go?"

"Great!" Courtney huffed exasperatedly, starting down the second trail, "What if one of them gets eaten by a bear?"

"You _really_ think they'd put us on an island with _wild_ bears running around?" Duncan snorted, "There's no way they'd do something that dangerous. Nah, this is just another lame reality show, honey."

"I have a _name_ you know," Courtney sniffed, her nose in the air.

"I'm sure you _do_," Duncan smirked.

"Ugh! Why do you have to be so contrary?!"

"Juvie'll do that to a guy," the delinquent said simply.

"You were in juvenile hall? This explains _so_ much…" Courtney chuckled behind her hand.

"And what's so funny about that, sweetcakes?" Duncan growled, his eyes narrowing.

"Oh, _nothing_! It's just that it's a little comforting knowing that you probably won't be able to hold down a job after this."

"Pfft, like I want to be a nine to five _drone_…"

"Hey DJ, what do you th-" Courtney began to say, turning to their large teammate, only to stop short when she saw the dozen or so small woodland creatures cuddling him.

"Hey man, how'd you do that?" Duncan asked.

"What can I say?" DJ smiled serenely, from his seat on a nearby stump, "Animals just like me."

Without warning, a dead fish dropped right next to the gentle giant with a loud splat. Chattering in alarm, all of the formerly peaceful denizens of the forest took that opportunity to latch onto DJ's skin with their teeth, claws, or beaks. Yelling in panic, the Jamaican-Canadian took off running down the path back towards camp.

Duncan laughed hysterically, clapping a hand to his forehead. Opening his eyes, he saw Courtney glaring at him and shaking her head.

"What? It was funny!"

"It was _not_ funny! He's our teammate!" Courtney spat at him, moving to follow the ever-diminishing screams still echoing down the trail.

"Oh, come _on_!" Duncan threw his hands in the air, "You've got to see the _irony_ here! The dude was going on about how 'at one with nature' he is and _then_ gets _attacked_ by a bunch of critters? That's hilarious!"

Courtney merely put her head in her hands, walking as far ahead of Duncan as she could; her shoulders shaking slightly.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Women!" the Mohawk-sporting teen shook his head at the camera, "No sense of humor…I mean, when was the last time you saw a _frog_ bite someone?"

XXXXXXXXXX

"Heh, okay," Courtney told the audience later, giggling, "it was a _little_ funny when he put it like that! But I couldn't let that _jerk_ know that!"

She gave the camera worried look. "Oh no! I'm not a bad person for laughing at DJ…am I?"

XXXXXXXXXX

Meanwhile, Leshawna and Heather were paddling Camp Wawanakwa's resident river, making seemingly idle conversation.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Heather seemed really nice. _Seemed_."

XXXXXXXXXX

"So," Heather said innocently, "what do you think of our fellow campers so far?"

"Well," Leshawna drawled, "I don't know 'bout you, but I don't think the otha' team's too tough; 'cept for that dude with the piercings and that girl looks like she's a German bodybuilder."

"Oh, I didn't mean the _other_ team…I was talking about the other Gophers…"

"Why you wanna' talk about them?" the sister inquired, ceasing her paddling.

"Well, this is a game, _right_? If we lose the first challenge, we're going to have to decide who has to go first."

"Why don't we worry about that _later_?" Leshawna said firmly.

"Pardon me for thinking ahead…" Heather shot back snootily, "All I'm saying is that if we team up now, the better chances we'll have later on."

"Sorry girl, but I'll be playing this game my _own_ way."

"Your loss. Oh well, I guess I'll have to find someone else to get to the finals with. I just hope you don't get…caught in the crossfire…"

Leshawna rounded on Heather. "Oh _no _you di'in't! Nobody threatens me and gets _away _with it!" Setting her oar aside, the curvy girl slapped her raft-mate across the face.

"Uh!" Heather cried indignantly, slapping her back, "Take that fatso!"

"Oh, it's _ON_ now!"

A veritable slapfest ensued, which kept both girls so occupied that they did not hear the telltale signs of rushing waters until it was too late.

XXXXXXXXXX

Several minutes beforehand, Harold had come upon an old tree lying across the ravine next to the waterfall.

"Excellent! This is an awesome place to focus my ki…"

Stepping boldly onto the molding trunk, the geek ran through a series of complicated movements, which included a lot of hand gestures, as well as oddly specific methods of breathing.

Harold was so focused in his task that the calm of his movements was not interrupted in the slightest as two of his fellow campers screeched past him on their quickly plummeting raft.

He was completely caught off guard, however, when Izzy chose that moment to swing right into him on a vine, sending both Killer Bass careening back into camp, straight into the confession cam. Its occupant, Lindsay, was jettisoned immediately, sending the pretty girl face first onto the grass, a roll of toilet paper spinning away from her.

XXXXXXXXXX

"I think the little bathroom kicked me out!" Lindsay pouted.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Dang…" Harold groaned, pinching his nose, "I think I got a nosebleed!"

XXXXXXXXXX

"So yeah," Izzy grinned, "Tarzan is like my idol! Well, him and James Bond, but I can't be like 007 anymore since my license to kill got revoked…it was just _one_ accountant, _geeze_…"

XXXXXXXXXX

As the three campers pulled themselves together, a brown and tan blur sped by them, too fast for even the cameras to catch. A dripping Leshawna followed close behind, dragging a limp and deflated raft behind her.

"You don't _even_ wanna' know…" the saucy girl said, sighing as she stomped past the trio towards the Gopher cabin.

XXXXXXXXXX

"That Heather girl is _trouble_! Mark my _words_…" Leshawna said, shaking her head.

XXXXXXXXXX

In the meantime, Noah and Ezekiel were currently watching, with no small amount of disgust and panic, as Chef Hatchet stuck his hand into the concoction he was making.

"Don't you boys worry none," their tormentor grinned, "I'll catch the sucker soon enough. Just consider what's left of him…_seasoning_…"

The pair exchanged terrified glances, struggling vainly against the ropes binding their arms to their sides.

"Ha! Gotcha'!" the island's cook said triumphantly, holding up the offending cockroach and crushing it with an audible squishing noise.

If anything, this caused Noah and Ezekiel to struggle more, glancing around at Eva and Tyler, who were apparently oblivious to their plight, but for very different reasons. Tyler was busy poking his hand, trying to determine whether he'd suffered any permanent damage. Eva on the other hand had inserted her headphones into her ears, the sounds of speed metal barely contained therein.

"Aren't you going to help us?!" Noah cried wildly.

"Hey dude, I've got my own problems!" Tyler shot back, "She might've broken my hand!"

"Aw, suck it up," Eva grunted, removing one of her earpieces, "You're not going to get any prize money by whining about it!"

XXXXXXXXXX

"That Eva girl's _alright_…" Hatchet said appreciatively, "She knows what it's all about. It's just like in the army: you make an example of the weak links and it gets the rest of them into line."

XXXXXXXXXX

"Alright boys…down the hatch!" the sadistic chef announced, forcing the two campers' mouths open and pouring some of his special mixture down their throats.

Their stomachs immediately rumbled in protest as their faces turned to an unhealthy shade of green. Tripping over each other, the homeschooler and the know-it-all made a beeline for the door.

XXXXXXXXXX

The confession cam mounted on the door of the outhouse shook as it banged shut, its glossy lens capturing the sight of the boys' simultaneous retching over the small opening in the seat.

XXXXXXXXXX

"One of the _worst _experiences of my…urp…life…" Noah choked, a grayish paste surrounding his lips.

XXXXXXXXXX

"I miss my mom's cooking already, eh," Ezekiel said, looking balefully at the camera.

XXXXXXXXXX

At the beach, Katie and Sadie were ogling Justin, giggling and pointing at his more attractive features. The two best friends made no effort to hide their observations and Justin didn't seem to mind either, although he was a bit preoccupied by looking at himself.

XXXXXXXXXX

"I'm used to it by now," the pretty boy shrugged, before wrinkling his nose in disgust, "What is that _smell_?!!"

XXXXXXXXXX

Back at the main camp, Beth had been showing the camera crew her baton-wielding skills.

"Watch me do it with the ends on fire now!" the eager girl said, twirling the blazing rod between her hands and tossing it high into the air. As the fiery object reached its peak and began to come back down, Beth's eyes widened.

"Uh oh…"

Diving out of the way, the hem of the wannabe's skirt was singed as the baton scorched its way through the dock instantly.

"Aw…" Beth groaned, kicking the ground with her foot, before walking off to the confessional, "that was my favorite baton…"

XXXXXXXXXX

"I really should've paid the extra five dollars for the catching class…"

XXXXXXXXXX

Stretching and yawning, Trent exited his cabin, looking around to see if anyone was in the camp. Turning his head at the sound of noises coming from the girls' side of the cabin, Trent went to knock on the door, before turning around, having decided that even interrupting a girl while she was changing would be a bad idea.

Returning to his bunk, the hipster retrieved his guitar and set off towards the dock. Upon reaching his destination, Trent stared at the gaping hole in the dock's center for a few seconds before settling for a seat on the steps leading down to the beach.

Across the way he spotted Katie, Sadie and Justin and waved to them. The three of them were otherwise occupied, however, and did not notice his gesture.

Shrugging, Trent began tuning his guitar.

XXXXXXXXXX

At that moment, Gwen decided to return to camp, having grown bored with being watched doing something as private as writing in her diary. Walking along the dirt path back to the main camp, she soon became aware of the distinctive sounds of a guitar being strummed. Spotting Trent, she stopped to listen, appearing somewhat dazed by what she heard.

XXXXXXXXXX

"He's actually pretty _good_," Gwen said appreciatively, before remembering herself and adopting a surly look, "I mean…it was _okay_…"

XXXXXXXXXX

As the sun made its way down, the various groups of campers began to congregate in the center of camp.

Although the majority looked relatively unscathed, Noah and Ezekiel were looking extremely pale, having spent the majority of the afternoon either being force fed Chef's nauseating mystery dish or having said dish climb back out of their stomachs in the most violent of fashions. Tyler was not in the best of shape either, given that his injured hand had warranted Chef's delicate medical expertise; which consisted of liberal amounts of painkillers, leaving the jock thoroughly loopy and out of touch. DJ was covered in bandages, due to the sheer number of bites, scratches and pecks he had endured. Leshawna had finally dried off, after deciding to join Katie and Sadie on the beach and letting the rays of the sun and the glow of Justin's skin warm her up. Heather, on the other hand, was appeared exactly as she had when she arrived.

XXXXXXXXXX

"It's a good thing I brought my blow dryer and two of my favorite outfit. I would've _died_ if the whole world had seen me all wet and gross!"

XXXXXXXXXX

"Alright everyone!" Chris addressed them all, "Who's ready for _dinner_?"

A collective groan escaped the campers' lips, along with a gagging sound in Noah's direction.

XXXXXXXXXX

Following yet another "delectable" meal, the campers followed Chris up to the campfire pit, where a roaring fire awaited them.

As she made to take her seat, Gwen was startled to find her seat higher up than she expected, and quite a bit more comfortable. Looking down, she was embarrassed to see that she had accidentally sat on Trent's lap.

"Uhhh…" Trent said, looking slightly amused and embarrassed himself, "Do you wanna'-"

"Yeah!" Gwen interjected quickly, taking the seat next to his and looking away, "Sorry…"

"Hey, no problem," Trent replied easily, "You're Gwen, right?"

"Yeah…and uh, your name's…Trent?"

"Uh huh," he nodded, removing his guitar from his back.

"You play guitar?" Gwen asked, obviously trying not to sound too interested.

"Yeah, my uncle taught me."

"Do you…take _requests_?" Gwen inquired, drawing her legs up to her chest in apparent nervousness.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Ugh, that was such a lame thing to say…" she groaned to herself.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Um, sure," Trent grinned, leaning in closer to her, "Did you have anything in mind?"

"Hey guys!" Cody said, popping up suddenly behind the two of them and clapping them both on the shoulders, "What's going on? You gonna' play guitar dude? That's cool. I'm _down_ with that…"

Recovering from their initial cringes, Gwen twisted out of Cody's friendly grip, while Trent responded, "I don't know man. It depends on what Chris has in mind for us…"

"Alright…do you mind if I just kind of hang here? All the seats are taken…"

"Whatever…" Gwen sighed, staring into the crackling flames.

"O-_kay_ campers!" Chris said, smiling, "Why don't you all tell each other a little bit about yourselves and what you think of the island so far?"

Most of them merely shrugged, while some of the campers whose days had been slightly more harrowing were glaring daggers at the host.

"I might as well get this over with," Gwen muttered. Speaking up so everyone could hear her, she said, "My name's Gwen. I entered this contest on a dare…I'm kind of regretting it now…"

"_Inspiring_ Gwen…" Chris drawled, "Who's next?"

"Oooo Chris! Chris!" Katie squealed. "Let us go next!" Sadie chimed in.

"Fine, fine! But bring it _down_ a notch girls!"

"'Kay!" the nearly identical girls chirped.

"I'm Sadie."

"And I'm Katie!"

"And we're totally the best of friends."

"I _never_ would've guessed…" Noah muttered under his breath, causing Tyler to snicker from his spot next to him.

"We both grew up next door to each other in Toronto and have never been apart since!"

"Well…you two may be in for a _rude_ awakening…" Chris said placidly, "But we'll cross that bridge when we get there!"

"I crossed a totally epic bridge today," Harold said smugly, elbowing Owen and puffing out his chest.

"Sweeeeeet," Owen nodded appreciatively, slapping hands with his nerdy neighbor.

"Anyway, who's next?"

"Uh, I guess I'll go," Bridgette spoke up. "Let's see…my name's Bridgette, I'm from Vancouver…"

"Oh, hey, me too," Trent said, giving Bridgette a thumbs up.

"Cool," the blonde girl smiled back, "Where exactly-"

"Is this _really_ necessary Chris?" Heather said irritably, cutting their bonding experience short, "I mean, if we're just going to go around like this we're going to be here all _night_!"

"Got someplace to be, prom queen?" Duncan sneered.

"No, but I'd rather not stay out here all night listening to everybody's life stories."

"Oh, you won't!" Chris declared, "After this we're going to sing _campfire _songs!"

That immediately got everyone's attention.

"Huh?"

"Awesome!"

"You're kidding me, right?"

"Say _what_ now?"

"_Please_ tell me you're _joking_…"

"Oh _yes_," Chris smiled, unperturbed by the contestants' reactions, "In fact, why don't you play us a tune Trent?"

Trent blanched slightly under the collective gazes of his fellow campers; and although there were some excited faces, the majority of them were either fearful or dangerously violent.

"Uh, no thanks Chris man…I draw the line at Kumbaya…"

After the campers' combined sigh of relief, Duncan stood up, turning to go. "Forget _this_. I'm going to bed."

There were murmurs of assent all around as everyone got up to follow him. As they reached the edge of the campfire pit, Chris called after them, "Okay fine! But don't come crying to me when you get a penalty!"

"Oh, come on!" Gwen said, "This wasn't a challenge. And besides, we're already living in the camp that time forgot. How can you make this any worse?"

Everyone else nodded, walking off and chatting amongst themselves.

XXXXXXXXXX

"I kind of took that as a challenge…" Chris said into the confessional, rubbing his hands together and chuckling.

XXXXXXXXXX

"So there you have it!" Chris winked. "The entire first day of TDI you never saw! Some of you may be thinking about how weird it is that some of the campers don't talk about what happened that day later on. Like I said before, we did a lot of reshooting to make up for the discrepancy. Now that may seem like a lot of trouble to go to, but if you've seen the show, you know that we like to do a _lot_ of things that are _really_ unnecessarily complicated! Tune in next time to find out what penalty I dealt out to the campers, and for more exciting deleted scenes!"

**Author's Note 2 (The Reckoning!): So the idea for this story was born out of the fact that I'd noticed that if the events of the first two episodes took place over one day, then there never would've been time for the "cameramen" to shoot the opening title sequence. Basically, From the Cutting Room Floor will be about all the little continuity errors and the things that were referred to in the episodes but we never actually got to see. Hope you enjoyed this first chapter! It's the longest single chapter I've ever written. Oh, and reviews would be most encouraging! Later campers!  
**


	2. Up and Off

Chapter 2: Up and Off

"Last time, on Total Drama Outtakes," Chris greeted the camera from in front of his shiny and luxurious trailer, "We revealed the rest of our favorite campers' first day at Camp Wawanakwa. Adventures were had, bonds were made, and it wouldn't be TDI without a little barfing! At the end of the day, I decided to get everyone together at the campfire pit for introductions and some sing-a-longs. But the campers wouldn't have any of it! So, I decided to give them a little punishment for not playing ball. What kind of penalty did I give the campers? Will anyone else vomit as a result? And how much longer do you think we can keep milking this show for? All this, and _more_, on this week's Total…_Drama_…Outtakes!"

XXXXXXXXXX

The sun was just beginning to rise on Lake Wawanakwa. Birds chirped happily and everything appeared right with the world.

That is, until a sudden, outraged cry rent the air. It was soon joined by others as the rest of the campers woke up.

"CHRIS!!!" Heather screeched, slamming the cabin door open and staring around wildly in search of her prey, still dressed in her nightwear.

"_Yes_…?" Chris's voice said innocently over the loudspeaker.

"_Where_ are my clothes?!"

"_Our_ clothes!" Gwen chimed in angrily.

"Yeah!" various other campers chorused as they joined the pair.

"Sorry dudes! I can't hear you, I'm _just_ a loudspeaker, la, la, la…" Chris sang tauntingly.

"You don't stop this nonsense right _now_, you're gonna' be less than _that_ in a second!" Leshawna growled, eliciting nods of agreement from Eva and Duncan.

"I _still_ can't hear you, but you _may_ be wondering why a _lot_ of your clothes are _gone_," Chris replied, "This is your penalty for not singing songs last night! You guys needed to learn that I'm the one who makes the rules. Also, Chef Hatchet and I thought that leaving you with only the clothes on your backs would be _hilarious_! And it _is_!"

He broke off, laughing to himself and leaving the campers to seethe.

"Guh! This is unacceptable!" Heather raged, stamping her foot.

"How am I going to accessorize now?!" Lindsay wailed. Justin patted her on the back, shaking his head in sympathy.

"It figures…" Gwen sighed, dropping down to sit on one of the steps in front of her cabin, "I'll bet this was in that stupid contract he made us sign…"

"Well…hic…at least we're stuck wearing our c-cutest outfit…" Sadie said to Katie between sobs.

"Oh, and guys," Chris's voice rang out, now coming from the man himself as he stepped out of the main cabin, "we've got a couple washers and dryers behind the kitchen in here, so you don't need to worry about stinking _too_ badly."

Finally seeing the cause of their misfortune, many of the campers rolled up their sleeves threateningly.

"Now, are you all going do as I say? And by 'all of you,' I mean _Duncan_."

The punk stopped hoisting Harold's underwear up the flagpole long enough to roll his eyes.

"And by do as I say, I mean…do…as I…say?" He turned to look at the cameraman, "We can edit that out right?"

XXXXXXXXXX

"Eheheh…" Chris laughed in the present, "I'm not the best at thinking on my feet…"

XXXXXXXXXX

"Anyway Duncan, I had a nice little chat with your parole officer and any more stunts like the one you pulled in the kitchen last night aren't going to win you any points dude."

"Whatever. It's not like all that fish was going to make the food _better_…"

XXXXXXXXXX

"I'm _not_ afraid of my _parole_ _officer_. The guy's got a toupee!" he sneered into the confession cam.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Augh!" Harold groaned, noticing his underwear's new location, "Idiot! That was my favorite pair!"

"Well, now it's the perfect flag for this hole of a camp," Duncan said saccharinely.

"Duncan's questionable pranks _aside_, why don't you all get dressed?" Chris cut in, "Because it's time for some scrumptious breakie!"

The campers' simultaneous groan was met on deaf, or possibly indifferent, ears.

After being served their sustenance, the various cast mates each had their two cents to share.

"Ugh!" Heather blanched, sticking her tongue out and pulling a hair off her purple omelet, "I am _not_ eating this! I wouldn't feed my horse this!"

"Yeah, isn't there some kind of law against this kind of treatment?!" Courtney demanded.

"There would be…if you hadn't signed your contracts! Really guys…let this be a lesson to ya': _always_ read your contracts! But no! All of you signed them right away 'cause you wanna' be famous…" Chris lectured them, grinning smugly before muttering to himself, "Wanna' be famous…that'd be a good song lyric for the show's theme…"

XXXXXXXXXX

"NAAAAH-nah-nah-nah-nah-NAAAH-nah-nah-nah-nah-nah-nahnahnah-nah-nah-nah-NAAAAAAH!!!" the host sang enthusiastically, head-banging along to the beat, "You're _welcome_!"

XXXXXXXXXX

"Anyway…it's time for your first challenge! Everybody swimsuit up and meet in center of camp in ten minutos!"

"What do you think they'll make us do?" Sadie muttered to DJ.

"It's our first challenge, how hard could it be?" the tall camper said reassuringly.

Everyone filed out quickly, fearful of what Chris would take away next should they be late.

In the guys' side of the Bass cabin, Geoff and Duncan finished the fastest, merely removing their shirts, and in Duncan's case, taking off his shoes.

"Hey what if we have to walk somewhere dude?" Geoff said inquiringly, glancing at Duncan's bare feet.

"I'm not worried. I've stepped on _pinecones_ before," the punk shrugged, digging a pair of sunglasses out of his duffel bag, "Besides, the only protection I need are these babies…"

"Nice shades man," DJ nodded appreciatively, removing his skullcap and tossing it on his bed.

"Yeah, I stole 'em off one of the guards before I left juvie…" Duncan said casually as he, DJ and Geoff left.

"This is gonna' be _awesome_! I've got a swimming challenge in the bag!" Tyler exulted, slipping on some sandals and snapping his headband into place on his forehead, "I was almost on my school's swim team."

"I haven't swam in very deep water before, eh," Ezekiel said worriedly, "Do ya' think the lake's very deep?"

"I wouldn't worry about it," Tyler reassured him, "Wherever we're swimming it's gonna' be close to the shore anyway. Now let's GO!"

"Alright!"

As the enthusiastic jock and his homeschooled companion charged out of the cabin, Harold muttered, "I just hope we get to wait thirty minutes before we swim. That could be real bad, especially since we just ate those yucky, purple egg thingies…"

XXXXXXXXXX

Over on the Gophers' porch, Gwen exited the cabin covering her ears; irritation etched on her face. Leshawna soon followed.

"Urgh!" Gwen growled, "I can't stand listening to her go on about how good she looks in her freaking bikini anymore!"

"Girl, you are preaching to the choir here. That girl needs to back off the self-advertisement, know what I'm sayin'?" Leshawna said, leaning against the porch's railing.

"That's for sure," the goth snorted.

"You're Gwen right?"

"Yeah. And you're Leshaw-WOW!"

"Um, no, it's _Leshawna_," she replied, frowning. When Gwen didn't respond she waved her hand in front of the pale girl's slack face several times. Turning around, Leshawna saw the reason for Gwen's sudden behavior.

Justin had just exited the boy's side of the cabin. Without his shirt.

"Eheh…" Gwen mumbled hazily, "Maybe this place won't be so bad…"

"Yeah…" Leshawna agreed; fanning herself as she and Gwen followed the model's toned backside out into the middle of camp.

Across the camp at the Bass cabin, Izzy watched this all with suspicion.

XXXXXXXXXX

"That ridiculously hot guy is magic! As long as he doesn't interfere with my sorcery, then he's okay. But if he does…then KAZOOIE!!!"

XXXXXXXXXX

As the campers congregated in the center of camp, some of them admiring others' bathing suits or lack thereof, they all looked around in search of their host.

Their wonderings were cut short when a loud whirring sound met their ears and a helicopter swooped down on the camp. Many of them clung tightly to their bathing suits, not wanting them to get blown off.

The motion of the blades dying down, Chris hopped out the door, exclaiming, "Woo! What a rush! Now! I'm glad you're all ready for your first challenge! So let's get to it!"

"You're not gonna' drop us into the lake from that thing are you?" Owen asked nervously, eyeing the helicopter.

"What? Heck no! We don't have enough fuel to do that for everyone! No, first you'll all be going on a hike! Now you see that big hill over there?"

"You mean that _massive_ peak covered in trees?" Noah said sardonically, "_Yes_, I _think_ we can see it…"

"Yeah. Thanks for that Noah…" Chris replied, rolling his eyes, "Now off you go!"

"But what's that sweet chopper for?" Cody asked.

"It's for me! So I don't _have_ to walk. Also, if you aren't quick about it, I may do some flybys at full speed. So hold on to your suits! Oh, and the person who gets there first wins their team…hehaha…the _privilege_ of going _first_," the host added ambiguously, "Anddddddd…GO!"

Most campers took off jogging. Some, like Owen, started well, but had to slow their pace considerably after a few meters.

XXXXXXXXXX

"I'm really more of a sprinter," the rotund bundle of joy explained, "Like a T-Rex! Rawr! Heheheheh! Mmmm, Stegosaurus…"

XXXXXXXXXX

Gwen, on the other hand, chose to walk.

XXXXXXXXXX

"I'm not worried about Chris. Unlike _SOME_ people, I'm wearing a bathing suit that'll stay _on_ when wind hits it!"

XXXXXXXXXX

Also choosing a slower pace were Noah, Heather, Lindsay, Sadie and Katie, and Owen, the latter of whom decided to walk after collapsing just outside of camp.

Huffing as she jogged up to them, Leshawna raised an eyebrow at the majority of her teammates. "What're ya'll doin'? The team that gets there first gets to go first!"

"Yeah…I'm _allergic_ to running," Noah shrugged unconvincingly.

"Don't get me wrong, I'm all about winning, but _not_ if my shoes are going to get all dirty," Heather said dismissively.

Lindsay, Katie and Sadie all nodded in agreement.

Owen spoke up, wheezing slightly, "I…tried…but I-"

"Yeah, don't worry about it big guy. I'd be surprised if you _didn't_ have a hard time," Leshawna interjected, turning to Gwen, "But what about you girl?"

"Well, I figure what with the crazy chef, the poisonous food, and the clothes-stealing host, whatever's waiting for us at the top of that hill isn't going to be good. So seeing the other team do it first will probably be better for us in the long run."

"Oh. Okay then," the sister nodded approvingly, "Think I'll join you then."

"Not a bad strategy…" Noah concurred.

"Ohmygosh!" Lindsay gushed suddenly to Katie and Sadie, "I just noticed how cute you two look in your suits! Pink is a really good color on you…"

"I know, right?" Katie giggled, putting her arm around her BFF.

"I suppose it couldn't hurt to walk a little faster though…" Gwen said, eyeing the trio of valley girls with distaste.

"Mmmhmm."

XXXXXXXXXX

Elsewhere, the majority of the Killer Bass, who were already ascending the hill, were in the midst of a heated debate.

"You're being _completely_ ridiculous."

"I dunno' Courtney, I think he's got a point."

"What?! Not you _too_ Bridgette!"

"Sorry," the surfer girl shrugged.

"Sunglasses do not _automatically_ make you cool!" the former CIT huffed stubbornly.

"Face it Princess: you lost," Duncan smirked.

"Name _one_ time when sunglasses _immediately_ made someone cooler!"

"The Terminator in Terminator 2," Harold suggested.

"Totally!" Geoff agreed, "Such a good movie!"

"I cried at the end…" DJ sniffed.

"Yeah, the first thing the Arnold does when he goes back in time is snatch a biker's leather jacket and his shades. Badass."

"Well, I haven't seen it, so I wouldn't know…" Courtney said primly.

"Then you haven't _lived_ yet," Harold said, "If you want I could summarize it for you."

"_No_ thanks. And shouldn't we be picking up the pace here people?!"

"I don't think we need to," Bridgette said, "Eva and Tyler were running _really_ fast."

"Yeah…poor guy…"

XXXXXXXXXX

"Keep running you wuss!"

"Agghhhh!!!!"

XXXXXXXXXX

"Okay, that girl, Eva, has got to get a handle on her temper," Courtney told the confessional, "She's only been here one day and already she's thrown her suitcase out the window and broke one of the locks on the bathroom door."

XXXXXXXXXX

"Hey!" Eva said into the camera, "I threw my suitcase 'cause there was a raccoon outside the cabin in broad daylight! It was probably rabid! And I broke the lock on that stall because Chris _MacStupid_ forgot to stock them with toilet paper!"

XXXXXXXXXX

As the two athletes continued up the hill, the incline became sharper.

"This…is getting…kind of tough!" Tyler wheezed.

"Fine!" Eva growled, "If you don't think you can handle it, I'll just go on without you!"

"Why are making me run like this?"

"Hey, I just thought you could keep up with me. I mean, you recovered from an arm wrestling match with me pretty quick so I thought you were made of tough stuff."

"Really?"

"Yeah, but _now_ I know you're just a pansy who heals quickly."

"Oh…" Tyler said, deflating slightly. Glancing at their surroundings, he noticed a glint of metal. "Hey! What's that over there?"

"Looks like…an escalator…"

"Sweet! Maybe it goes to the top of the hill!"

Running over to the bizarrely placed piece of machinery, the jock leapt over the guardrail, only to trip and go tumbling down the steps.

Popping up almost immediately, Tyler stared at the moving staircase dejectedly. "Aw! It only goes down!"

"Humph," Eva snorted, "Good luck climbing _that_ thing. I'll see you at the top!"

Using the escalator as a guideline, she scaled the steep slope with ease. However, Eva was surprised to see Tyler sprinting up the steps, despite their descending movement, a few moments later.

When she reached the summit, she found her slim teammate curled in a fetal position muttering to himself.

"What happened to _you_?"

Tyler merely shook his head, refusing to answer.

XXXXXXXXXX

"I turned around…and there was a sign with a picture of a chicken on it! Chickens freak me out! And it was so…_real_ looking…"

XXXXXXXXXX

Looking around at the flat plateau at the top of the hill, Eva spotted Chris and Chef removing a large crate with a chicken stamped on it from their helicopter.

Seeing the muscular girl, Chris waved. "Congratulations Eva! For making it up here first, your team gets to go first!"

He snickered and shared a glance with Chef, leered menacingly at Eva, to little effect. Clambering back into the vehicle, the large man took off again, heading in the direction of the docks.

As the wind blew down at them, Chris ran his hands through his already windswept locks and yelled over the loud noise, "Awesome! This wind is great for my hair!"

"Actually," Eva said, once Chef was no longer buffeting the three of them with air, "it was Jockstrap here that got here first. Don't ask me how though…"

Tyler stood up on shaky knees, surveying the hilltop. "So what's the challenge here?"

"Well, I'll wait to explain it fully until everyone gets here, but here's a teaser: what do you get when you add swimsuits and a _giant_ cliff?"

"Uh…"

"I can see why gym is your favorite class dude…"

XXXXXXXXXX

"My family runs a small farm. We couldn't really afford ta' have a big one anyway, since it's so cold mosta' da year."

"No way! I grew up on a farm too!" Beth squealed excitedly.

She, Cody and Ezekiel were all walking together. Although they had started off well, they all didn't see the point after some of their teammates had blazed by them.

"I didn't have a lot of friends growing up, but I did have a really great pig for a pet."

"That's really neat, eh!"

Cody observed this whole exchange, unsure of what to say.

XXXXXXXXXX

"It's not that often that I feel like I'm the coolest one in a conversation…it's not as satisfying as I thought it'd be…"

XXXXXXXXXX

Further on, Trent and Justin were still running at a decent clip.

"So…do you…think there's…anyone…behind us? We did just…pass a lot of people…on the other team. I…want to…look…but I'm…afraid looking back…might slow me down…" Trent spoke between breaths.

"Don't worry," Justin said, removing a mirror from his back pocket, "I've got it covered."

Using it like a rearview mirror, the bronzed model checked behind them for any pursuing Bass.

"We're all clear!"

"Thanks man! Hey, your name's…Justin…right?"

Trent was met with silence however, as the island's resident eye candy was taking the opportunity to admire his own chiseled features in the mirror's surface.

XXXXXXXXXX

"I don't think I've ever met a guy that into what he looks like before…" Trent told the confession cam later, "I swear I saw him _kissing_ that mirror last night before he went to sleep…_creepy_!"

XXXXXXXXXX

Back on the cliff top, Chris, Tyler and Eva were startled to see a hand pop up suddenly over the edge of the precipice. The appendage was soon followed by Izzy.

"Whew, that was a nice workout!"

"No _way_!" Chris said, staring with disbelief at the frizzy redhead, "Did you actually climb that cliff?!"

"Um…_yeah_! It's not like it was _hard_ or anything. I was all like Sylvester Stalone in that one movie…Adrian! Heheh…"

XXXXXXXXXX

"At least I'm not the only one on my team who can take the initiative" Eva said in the outhouse, "Izzy's a little nuts though. I'm glad she's not on the other team. She'd be a tough competitor."

XXXXXXXXXX

"Ha!" Chris laughed in the present, lounging in a folding chair, "Irony in hindsight is _still_ funny…"

XXXXXXXXXX

"Aw…crud…" Trent wheezed as he reached the top of the hill, "All three of you…beat us?"

"That's right Trent! _Too_ bad for you and Justin," Chris answered, "and the Screaming Gophers! Oh well."

"So what is this challenge anyway?"

"Take a look around."

Trent noticed the precarious ledge at the end of the peak. Putting two and two together, he looked at Chris with wide eyes, "You're…not _serious_ are you?"

"Oh, it gets _worse_ man! Haha!"

XXXXXXXXXX

"Y'know," Trent said into the camera, "I think all this power is going to Chris's head. I don't remember him being like this at all on that figure skating show."

XXXXXXXXXX

"Just goes to show that what they show you isn't all that happens!" Chris lectured, "Also, my makeup looked _terrible_ on that show! Although…that makeup artist was kinda' _hot_…I should call her again…"

XXXXXXXXXX

Soon after, the rest of the campers began to arrive, all eager to know what their first challenge was.

DJ summed it up for them all when he glanced over the cliff at the drop below: "Oh sh**!"

XXXXXXXXXX

The Killer Bass were regretting their initial zeal, particularly Tyler, after doing a belly flop onto a buoy.

After Geoff and Eva jumped, Duncan sighed. "I suppose I'll get this over with."

On his way down, he eyed the camera tracking his fall, his expression clearly unimpressed.

XXXXXXXXXX

"All we had to do was let gravity do its thing. Big wup. I'll bet those sharks are animatronics too…"

XXXXXXXXXX

Following DJ's backing out and Ezekiel's enthusiastic leap, Harold made history with his cringe-worthy crotch flop.

XXXXXXXXXX

"It was like someone broke my biscuits in _half_!" the redheaded nerd told the audience.

XXXXXXXXXX

"I get hurt a _lot_," Tyler said, rubbing the large red mark on his chest, "but that was the most _painful_ thing I've _ever_ seen! I'll take a sore chest over that _any_ day!"

XXXXXXXXXX

Finally, the Bass finished their first leg of the challenge when Courtney declined to jump and Katie got her wish to be with her best friend when she traded places with Izzy.

Up on the cliff top, Leshawna and Heather were arguing back and forth, and while most of their teammates were uneasy at the friction on their team, Noah was enjoying their repartee.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Even _I_ enjoy a good catfight…particularly when the insults are so _excellent_!"

XXXXXXXXXX

Down on the beach, Duncan greeted DJ and Courtney as they made their way out of the woods, "Well, if it isn't Chicken Little and Chicken Humongous!"

"Sorry guys," DJ apologized, hanging his head, "I've been afraid of heights since I was little."

"Hey, don't sweat it dude…" Geoff reassured him, patting him on the back.

"What's your excuse then?" Eva growled at Courtney.

"For one, I'm _not_ suicidal. _And_, I'm positive we'll have more people jump than them."

"I hope you're right," Bridgette muttered, "because that snooty girl just jumped off."

"Actually," Tyler said, "I think the black girl _threw_ her off."

XXXXXXXXXX

After Lindsay's wild, flailing fall, Gwen stepped up to the edge, chanting to herself, "One hundred thousand dollars, a hundred thousand dollars…Unaaooooghhhhh!!!!"

Cody followed, kicking his legs and screaming in a slightly girly manner.

Izzy smiled, saying before she jumped, "When Izzy goes up, she must come down! Wahahahahaha!"

Justin then performed the first shark-related miracle by charming them with his ridiculous good looks.

Izzy watched intently from the bow of the Boat of Losers. "So, you have powers over animals as well! This will be quite the challenge…"

While Cody and Leshawna mocked Beth for not jumping, "Bawk, bawk bawk!" Gwen chose not to.

XXXXXXXXXX

"I didn't blame Beth. We were all _lucky_ we didn't get bitten by one of those sharks. And if she'd rather keep all her limbs, I'm not going to call her a chicken."

XXXXXXXXXX

With Trent's jump, only Noah and Owen were left.

"Hmm, well, if you jump in after me Jumbo, I probably won't have too much to worry about from the sharks…" Noah commented lightly, "See you down there!"

XXXXXXXXXX

"In retrospect, I probably shouldn't have stayed _directly_ under where Owen was going to land," the know-it-all frowned.

XXXXXXXXXX

Owen then made his big splash, which sent all the campers, especially Noah and Trent, and Chef flying, and whose ripples temporarily flooded a tuck shop on the other side of the lake.

Chris descended the escalator, surveying the mayhem it had caused.

"Alright campers! Go back to camp, get changed, then meet back here, A.S.A.P.! You've got some crates to shift! And Owen! For cryin' out loud dude! Put some _clothes_ on! Every second you're naked onscreen is more money we have to put into blurring out your coconuts!"

"I can't help that I lost my suit!" the largest camper said indignantly. His little moment of fortitude was ruined, however, when the tide shifted suddenly, removing his liquid cover.

"Aw!"

"My eyes!"

"You are _so_ walking behind us when we go back Owen…" Heather said angrily, her back turned away from her over-sized naked teammate.

XXXXXXXXXX

As the campers left the beach, Hatchet eyed the turned over boat and beached sharks.

"You really 'spect me to take care of this?" he demanded.

"Yep," Chris smiled, "It's in your contract! Ha ha! Have fun with that man."

Chef growled at the smug host as he sauntered away.

"Damn contract," he grumbled, grabbing one of the sharks by the tail and lobbing it back into the lake before it could bite him.

XXXXXXXXXX

"When that thing expires, I'm gonna' wring his scrawny little neck!"

XXXXXXXXXX

"Aheheh…" Chris laughed nervously, tugging at his collar, "I don't know _why_ the other producers felt like they had to put _that_ in…"

XXXXXXXXXX

"I do!" Chef chuckled darkly, sharpening a pair of knives ominously.

XXXXXXXXXX

With Heather and Eva's persuasive insistence, the campers all changed quickly and made their way back to the crates.

Chef had cleared up the beach for the most part, although he was now sporting a few teeth marks on his arms.

Chris was waiting for them as well, grinning, as per usual. "Geeze people! Take your time!"

"Oh, give us a _break_ already!" Leshawna huffed angrily, "We've been running back and forth across the island _and_ jumped off a cliff! What have _you_ done today?"

"My hair," Chris said with a straight face, "You wouldn't _believe_ how hard it is to manage…"

"Oh, I totally believe you Kyle," Lindsay said, "It looks like a rat's nest or something."

Snickers broke out among the campers, as Chris's lips twisted into a sour look. "_Thanks_ Lindsay…and it's _Chris_! I'm not gonna' tell you again."

"Oh! Oops…_sorry_…"

"That wasn't _bad_…" Heather muttered to her, "pretending to forget his _name_ like that…"

"_Thanks_ Hannah!"

"Now," Chris continued before Heather could utter a spluttered reply, "since the Screaming Gophers won, they'll get pull carts for their crates. Killer Bass…good luck getting your crates back to camp! And remember people: you're building a hot tub that _you_ get to use! So make them not _suck_!"

The Killer Bass all turned to their heavy looking crates with apprehension, with the exception of Eva, who picked hers up without batting an eyelid.

The Gophers all began working together to lift the crates into their carts. As the trundled off back towards camp, Owen began singing "99 bottles of pop on the wall."

Soon enough, all the other Gophers were joining in.

XXXXXXXXXX

"I'll say this for that big tub of lard," Heather said begrudgingly, "He got everyone on the team to work together. And of course, I _have_ to be a team player…for the time being…"

XXXXXXXXXX

"Hey," Noah shrugged, "When in Rome…of course, Rome in this case is a worst summer camp _ever_…the metaphor still works though. I'm sure that at one time in Rome's _vast_ empire there was a place like this."

XXXXXXXXXX

"I drank 99 bottles of pop once," Owen said proudly, "I burped so loud, I broke the coffee table!"

XXXXXXXXXX

Elsewhere, while some of the Killer Bass were making steady progress, i.e. Eva, DJ, Tyler, Geoff, Bridgette and Duncan, the rest were struggling.

Courtney's eye swelling up made seeing around the large box she was pushing even more difficult.

Sadie and Katie, meanwhile, were busy with their poison ivy related issues.

Harold and Ezekiel, on the other hand, were having difficulty shifting their heavy crate more than a half a foot with each push.

"Gee! I didn't think there'd be any heavy lifting, eh."

"Don't you live on a farm?" Harold asked, digging his shoulder against the crate, "Don't you hafta' lift hay and stuff?"

"No, my dad does that. I mostly deal with our animals and keep the wild ones away from our fields. We've been having a real problem with beavers this year."

"You've got your work cut out for you. Beavers can be very territorial. If you want, I could show you the journal I'm keeping about them."

"Neat! That'd be a big help, eh!"

"Come _on_ you two!" Courtney yelled, "Let's go!"

"Geeze…" Harold muttered, "Take a _chill_ pill…"

"What's a chill pill?"

XXXXXXXXXX

Up ahead, Geoff and Bridgette were both pushing a crate together.

"Boy, having a hot tub would be so rad!"

"I know!" Bridgette said, nodding, "It'd be especially great today. I haven't worked out this much since my last surfing competition."

"Hey! Surfer girl!" Eva called, walking down the path that led into camp, "Go back and check what's taking those slackers so long! Chris says we can't start opening the crates until they're _all_ at the camp!"

"Okay!"

"Later Bridgette."

"Uh…bye, Geoff…" Bridgette said, smiling with a cocked eyebrow.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Why would he say goodbye when he was just going to see me again in a few _minutes_? Does he l-…y'know what? I'm probably reading _way_ too much into this…"

XXXXXXXXXX

Back at the campgrounds, Owen dug through his opened crate and pulled out some planks. "Hey! Check it out! I got wood!"

Over where the Bass were waiting, Duncan snickered. At Geoff and DJ's blank stares, he said, "Please, _tell_ me you got that!"

"What?" Geoff wondered, "All he said was 'I got…' Oh! _Good_ one dude…"

XXXXXXXXXX

On the beach, Bridgette advised Katie and Sadie to take a dip in the water to alleviate their poison ivy problem. "It should cool down the burning sensation, at least until you can get some cream to take care of the rash. You do have that kind of stuff, right Chris?"

"Oh, sure," the host assured her, "Some of our interns got it pretty bad while they were here."

"What do you mean _were_?"

"Nothing! See ya'!" Chris said quickly, speeding away on his ATV (or quad, depending on where you're from).

"Okay! Harold, you take their crate and Ezekiel, you pick up yours. We need to get their as fast as we can if we're going to catch up!"

"But I-"

"Do it!"

XXXXXXXXXX

"Courtney's real bossy," Harold told the camera, "She's just like one of the counselors in my Opossum Scout troupe. No wonder she was a CIT."

XXXXXXXXXX

At the camp, Heather had just finished "apologizing" to Leshawna.

Giving the stuck up girl a sideways look, Gwen said to Leshawna, "You _do_ know she was lying through her teeth, _right_?"

"Oh, no doubt!" the sista' replied, "But if she thinks I'm gonna' be all nice to her, she's in for one heck of a surprise!"

XXXXXXXXXX

"Somebody needs to take that girl down a few pegs. And if you want somethin' done right, you gotta' do it _yourself_!"

XXXXXXXXXX

Just then, Courtney, Ezekiel and Harold walked up, feeling extremely relieved to be able to finally set down their crates.

"Ooooh!" Leshawna said concernedly, "What happened to your _eye_, girl?"

"N-nothing! Just an allergy," Courtney replied, clapping a hand to her face.

"Think it's gettin' worse," Ezekiel pointed out.

"_Shut up_!" the freckled girl hissed, "_We don't want them to know that_!"

The geek and the sheltered farm boy exchanged puzzled glances.

"Why?" they chorused.

"Because we can't let them _know_ how _badly_ we're doing. It's just like in politics: you want to make it _seem_ like you're stronger than your opponent _even_ if you're not."

"Oh…so it's like makin' yourself look bigger to scare off a wolf?"

"…S-sure…if that _helps_…" Courtney said uncertainly, as she took a seat on the Bass cabin's steps to catch her breath.

Harold and Ezekiel joined her, as Geoff clambered up onto one of the crates. As Harold was beginning to nod off, Geoff delivered a pep talk, trying to get his team in the game.

It succeeded somewhat, as Courtney took charge, ordering Bridgette to retrieve Katie and Sadie and the rest of her team to begin opening the crates.

The latter took less time than they expected, thanks to Eva's abnormally sharp teeth.

XXXXXXXXXX

"I file my canines," the intimidating athlete explained.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Okay," Courtney instructed, "let's take an inventory."

"Well," DJ said, looking between their pile of supplies and the Gophers' hot tub, which was halfway done, "it looks like they've got a lot more parts for their motor than we do."

"We also don't have any nails," Eva frowned.

"What?! Oh, this is _hopeless_!" Courtney despaired.

"Hey, relax drama queen," Duncan said, pulling something out of his back pocket and throwing it to her, "We can use that."

"Duct tape? Duncan, _where_ did you _get_ this?"

"Chef Hatchet _may_ have had some lying around in the kitchen…I figured it'd come in handy, since it fixes anything and everything."

"While I don't condone your…_methods_…I suppose it'll have to do. And you're giving it back after the challenge!"

"Sure…whatever you say cy-"

"Shut up! And start working on the motor. DJ, you help him. Geoff, you, Harold, Tyler and Eva start working on the frame."

"Hey!" Geoff exclaimed, "We could still use the nails from the crates!"

"Excellent! Tyler, you and Eva get to work on that."

"What about me, eh?" Ezekiel asked.

"Uh…why don't we just wait and see where you can help out?"

XXXXXXXXXX

"Honestly," Courtney told the confession cam, "I _really_ didn't want him touching anything. I mean, he just finished picking his _nose_! And there was no _way_ I was going to sit in a hot tub made by someone with _snot_ on their hands…"

XXXXXXXXXX

Things did not go as well for them as Courtney had hoped. Geoff and Harold's attempts to keep the tub's frame straight and intact proved fruitless, at least while Eva and Tyler were dismantling the crates.

Bridgette finally got back with Katie and Sadie and joined in with the frame's construction.

However, Duncan and Tyler soon got into a fight about who got to use their only hammer.

"Listen, pal," the punk growled, tugging the tool toward him, "I need the hammer to bang that motor into shape!"

"Well I need it to get a bent nail outta' one of the crates," Tyler countered yanking the hammer away from Duncan. Their argument eventually sent the hammer flying and struck Harold straight in the groin.

XXXXXXXXXX

"My biscuits felt like they were broken in half _before_," Harold said in an unusually high voice, "and now they feel like they're in _tiny_ _pieces_!"

XXXXXXXXXX

Eventually, the Killer Bass managed to erect something that resembled a hot tub, although the motor was mostly for show and a seagull had unfortunately chosen it as a place to dip its feet.

The Screaming Gophers' tub, meanwhile, was fully functioning and Chris immediately declared it to be an awesome hot tub. The Gophers cheered and Owen popped out from under the bubbling surface, once again sans swimming trunks.

XXXXXXXXXX

"I was just so _excited_ when I saw it was done! I couldn't resist taking a dip! And I didn't want to get my gitch all wet and soggy…"

XXXXXXXXXX

After Chris stated the obvious and announced the Gophers as the winners, the winning team took the opportunity to celebrate.

Owen's exuberant dancing drew Chris's eye and the host recoiled, "Dude! What did I say about being naked?! Put some pants on!"

"But how am I going to enjoy the hot tub Chris?"

"I'll have one of the camera crew run out and get you a new pair of trunks. Until then, keep your shorts on! Now, why doesn't everybody head over to the mess hall for some chow?"

XXXXXXXXXX

In the main cabin, while the Bass debated who to vote off, the Gophers discussed the day's challenge.

"What a way to kick off the competition…" Cody marveled.

"Sure," Gwen drawled, poking at her gruel, "an insane cliff dive into shark-infested waters and then hot tub construction…did he think one had anything to do with the other, or what?"

"Hey, at least nobody got hurt…" Trent said, looking at her from around Owen's girth.

"Tell that to tall, white and nerdy over there," Gwen replied, pointing at Harold, who was returning his bowl to the counter while keeping one hand on the ice pack over his lower region.

All the guys on the team muttered in agreement, shifting almost unconsciously.

"NO!!!!" Lindsay yelled suddenly, drawing looks from her teammates, "I, I mean…no…salt! There's no salt…on the table. _Bummer_…"

"Why don't you let me get you some, pretty lady?" Cody said, with all the fake suaveness he could muster.

"Um…sure…"

Noah glanced down at the gray slop affixed to his bowl. Looking up, he saw Owen shoveling his down.

"Hey Owen? Do you want my food?"

"DO I?!" the big camper cried, snatching the bowl from him and plopping Noah's former helping on top of his own.

Taking his now empty bowl, Noah got up to return it to the counter, passing by Harold on his slow way to do the same thing.

Just then, the two nerds overheard Ezekiel say, "Well, I just don't get why we lost, eh. They're the ones that have six girls."

Noah, Harold, and Cody, who was on his way back from the kitchen with some salt, stopped dead, transfixed by the horror that followed.

"What's that supposed to mean?!" Bridgette demanded, the normally calm girl raising her fist threateningly.

"Yeah, Home-school!" Eva said menacingly, slamming her fist on the table, "Enlighten us!"

"Well, guys are much stronger and better at sports than girls are," Ezekiel answered, obliviously.

Eyes widening, the trio of nerds backed away as fast as they could; while Katie and Sadie's eyes twitched.

"Oh _snap_!" Geoff said in disbelief, "He did _not_ just _say_ that!"

"My dad told me to look out for the girls here, eh. An' help 'em in case they can't keep up."

"Still think we need your help keeping up?" Eva asked, as she lifted the toque-sporting teen off his feet by his neck.

"Not…really…" he choked.

"Okay, guys," Geoff interrupted quickly, ever the peacemaker, "Let's give 'em a break…I mean, at least he doesn't think that guys are smarter than girls…"

"But, they _are_…" Ezekiel spoke up, rather unwisely from the floor, where Eva had dropped him.

"That's _it_! You're going _down_ you little creep!" Eva roared.

As he fled the dining hall, campers from both teams rushed to the door to watch what she did to him.

XXXXXXXXXX

"It was like a train wreck," Geoff said in the confessional, "I just couldn't look away."

XXXXXXXXXX

"Wow!" Bridgette said in awe, "I do _not_ want to _ever_ get on her bad side!"

XXXXXXXXXX

"I like that Eva's _style_…" Heather smirked, nodding approvingly.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Okay, _that's_ the most painful thing I've ever seen," Tyler amended.

XXXXXXXXXX

Later, as night was beginning to fall, DJ and Geoff went to wake up Duncan from his nap.

"C'mon man!" DJ whispered, shaking the delinquent awake, "It's time to go to the campfire thing and vote somebody off."

"Already?" Duncan yawned, "So what's the deal? Are we voting off Ms. 'I'm a CIT' tonight?"

"Actually, dude…y'know that home-schooled guy?" Geoff asked.

"What? The guy with the hat?"

"Yeah. After you left, he made some totally sexist comments."

"So?"

"_So_, the girls _flipped_ dude! Eva-…well, you'll see what she did to him, c'mon."

Exiting the cabin, Duncan looked around.

Eyes widening, he grinned, "No way! That's _cruel_ man!"

High above the campground, hung Ezekiel, his underwear tied to the flagpole's pulley.

"Why's he still up there?"

"Chris _wanted_ to take him down. Somethin' about a lawsuit," DJ explained, "But I think Eva scared him so much that he just left him there."

"I suppose we can take him down _now_," Geoff mused, scratching his head.

"Thanks for showin' me," Duncan said, walking off toward the campfire before pausing, "So how _do_ we vote, _anyway_?"

"Oh, Chris explained how while you were out. Ya' just go into the confession stall, say who you want to go, and write it on a slip of paper."

"Has everybody already done it?"

"Yeah. Just you and Home-school up there're left."

As Duncan went over to the outhouse to cast his vote, DJ and Geoff lowered the by now miserable Ezekiel down from his perch; helping him hobble over to the stall to go after Duncan.

XXXXXXXXXX

Back in present day, Chris explained, "I _was_ worried about a lawsuit, but I've smoothed it all out; which is why we were able to show you all of that _awesome_ footage. And now, for the first time on TV, we'll show you all the campers' confessional votes!"

XXXXXXXXXX

"Home-school," Eva glared, "If he's not _gone_, then I'll make that twerp _wish_ I'd run him up a flagpole again!"

XXXXXXXXXX

"Definitely Courtney," Tyler said, his arms crossed, "She wanted _me _gone? Let's see how _she _likes it!"

XXXXXXXXXX

"Sorry little home-schooled dude…" Geoff said apologetically, "You can't go _saying _stuff like that. You're harshin' the mellow of the _team_, man…"

XXXXXXXXXX

"Oh, the home-schooled guy," Sadie said, while Katie, who was in the stall with her, nodded in agreement, "Courtney may be bossy, but at least she's not _mean_ about it."

XXXXXXXXXX

"E-va!" Ezekiel squeaked, his voice higher than usual, due to receiving the second worst atomic wedgie in history (for the worst atomic wedgie in history, read the Author's Note below).

XXXXXXXXXX

"Courtney," Harold said, "What Ezekiel said was kinda' harsh, but I'd rather have him around than hafta' relive my second year of Opossum Scouts…"

XXXXXXXXXX

"I'm voting for that sexist pig, Ezekiel," Courtney scowled, "Sexism is one of the reasons women have _such _a hard time in the workplace and-"

XXXXXXXXXX

"We're just gonna' skip past most of that," Chris informed the audience, "She goes on for a _while_…"

XXXXXXXXXX

"I'm sorry, but if you don't _think_ I can '_keep up_,' then I can't trust you to be on _my_ team," Bridgette said, "Home-school…what's his real name, again?"

XXXXXXXXXX

"Sorry dude," DJ shook his head, "but digging on girls like that is just _whack_."

XXXXXXXXXX

"I can't stand bossy chicks," Duncan frowned, "But, having every single chick on your team mad at you 'cause you kept around someone who pisses them off, is a _million _times worse. Especially if one of those girls is Eva! I've seen guys go to _juvie _for less than what she did to that guy. Later Home-school!"

XXXXXXXXXX

With the decision made, although not without a little dramatic presentation by Chris, Ezekiel loped off down the Dock of Shame and was greeted by Chef, who drove him off across the lake.

"That's just how I was raised eh…" the show's first loser explained, "I didn't know any better…I'm gonna' have a long talk with my dad when I get home."

"Oh, you're not _goin_' home Sweats!" Chef said mysteriously, "You're goin' someplace _much_ better…"

"You're not gonna' _kill _me are you?!"

"What?! Heck no! What kinda' guy you think I am?!"

"You did force feed me something with cockroach in it…"

"Oh, right…good times…but no! I ain't gonna' _kill_ ya'. No, I'm just taking you to this fancy shmancy resort type place 'til the competition's ova' with."

XXXXXXXXXX

"Holy cow!" Ezekiel said after being shown around the resort by its staff, "I get to stay _here_ the whole summer instead of at that crummy camp? Maybe bein' voted off first isn't so bad, eh…"

XXXXXXXXXX

Meanwhile, the Screaming Gophers celebrated their victory until well after their bedtimes. Owen supplied them with juice boxes, which were a welcome reprieve from the questionable liquids and second rate instant coffee they were usually served.

"Mmm," Beth murmured as she let the warm bubbles wash over her, "I could get used to this."

"Why don't you get _in _Gwen?" Cody asked, "The water's nice!"

"Yeah, I've had enough water for one day. Besides-"

Just then, a stream of bubbles popped to the surface around Owen, who sniggered nervously.

Revolted, most people immediately got out.

"My point, _exactly_," Gwen said.

Izzy however, stayed in.

"More for Izzy and Owen! Alright!" she grinned.

"Yeah…" Owen sighed dreamily.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Thought you knew everything about TDI didn't you?" Chris smirked, "Well, turns out, that just like Owen in a thong, you're just plain wrong! There are still plenty of unanswered questions. Tune in next time when we cover what the campers did during their big awake-a-thon! Try as we might, those campers found plenty of ways to stay up for three days! Find out what hijinks they got up to while trying to keep their eyelids open, on Total _Drama_ Outtakes!

XXXXXXXXXX

**Author's Note for People That Are Awesome and Read Author's Notes**:

I think I understand why the writers of TDI limited the number of returning contestants for season 2. Keeping track of all those characters is a hassle! I apologize for not updating sooner, blah, blah, blah, fish cakes, blah, blah, blah, I'm _not_ a liar, blah, blah, blah! In all honesty, I had intended for this chapter to be shorter, but more is better right? Anyway, the object of this fic, aside from making me, and hopefully _you_, happy, is to address continuity errors and fill in the blanks on the show. So **review** and let me know what you like and if you think of anything I haven't cleared up, or can in the future, let me know.

Also, the worst atomic wedgie in TV history occurred in the sixth episode of the fifth season of Scrubs, called "My Missed Perception." You can probably find it on Youtube if you search for "four story atomic wedgie."

**Shout Outs & Recommendations** (because having something that people are somewhat guaranteed to read is a great way to call attention to cool stuff that needs recognition)

6teen: Seriously. If you like TDI, then watch it. The same people made it and there are a lot of the same voice actors. It also has one of my favorite animated pairings.

Total Drama Comeback, by The Kobold Necromancer: Biggest, best TDI fic out there. Give it a read.


	3. They're Just Dead

Chapter 3: They're Just Dead…Tired

"Previously, on Total Drama Outtakes," Chris said, narrating over scenes from the previous episode, "we saw the campers lose the clothes off their backs. Owen even got totally nude. Not something I _ever_ wanted to see again, but, you know Owen…Oh! And some clothes went up someone's butt. _Yikes_! I don't envy you Ezekiel dude…as if that weren't punishment enough, the little guy got voted off first. But you already knew _that_! The real highlight of the show, as _usual_, was yours truly! If you thought my hair looked awesome in that episode, it'll look even better in this one, especially next to all the campers, since they all went without showers for _days_. What drama will come out of the already cranky campers going without sleep? What did Chef and I do to keep ourselves busy? And what's the secret to my magnificent locks' silky shine? The answers to all these questions, _except_ the last one, on this week's Total…_Drama_…Outtakes!"

XXXXXXXXXX

On the morning of the third day, Chris woke all the campers up with a blow horn amplified by a megaphone. Leshawna's angry shouts soon followed.

"Unh! Do you _have_ to be so _loud_ Leshawna?" Heather demanded blearily, sitting up in her bunk, "_Some_ of us are trying to get some beauty sleep! Something _you_ could probably do with…"

Leshawna lunged toward her, only to be held back by Gwen and Izzy. "Ooo, you do _not_ wanna' cross me _this_ early in the mornin'!"

"What_ever_, ghetto girl…" her scheming teammate replied, hopping down from her bunk and changing her clothes.

"C'mon people!" Chris's voice sounded from outside, "Don't bother taking a shower. You're just going to stink anyway! Now let's get going!"

"_No_ _shower_?!" Heather paled, her mouth agape.

"C'mon Leshawna," Gwen said reassuringly, "At least _she's_ miserable now."

XXXXXXXXXX

"Y'know," Leshawna said in the confessional, "For a goth girl, Gwen's not nearly as morbid as I thought she'd be."

XXXXXXXXXX

"I _hate_ this place with a passion that _consumes_ my soul…" Gwen told the audience later, bags under her eyes.

XXXXXXXXXX

As the Bass guys exited their cabin, DJ turned to Harold, asking him, "Dude, do you always snore like that?"

"Pretty much. It used to bother my big brother a ton when we had bunk beds. Sorry if it's keeping you guys awake and stuff."

"Don't sweat it man. I fell asleep eventually."

"Enh, once I'm out, I stay that way," Duncan grunted.

Geoff and Tyler merely yawned and nodded their agreement.

The campers all gathered in a line in the center of camp, some more groggy-eyed than others.

XXXXXXXXXX

"I'm not exactly what you'd call a _morning_ person," Justin said, rubbing his eyes tiredly, "I _need_ coffee to be at my best. Of course, my worst is _still_ better than most people at _their_ best, but even so…"

XXXXXXXXXX

Chris strutted down the line, receiving a sycophantic compliment from Heather regarding his shorts. He then informed the campers of their next task: a 20 kilometer run.

An outraged Eva had to be restrained from striking him by Duncan and Geoff.

Clearly enjoying himself, and even telling the campers as much, Chris sent them off to the starting line.

Most of the campers took off running, with Geoff, Courtney, Trent, Eva, Lindsay and Beth taking the lead.

This main group was closely followed by Justin, Bridgette and Noah slightly behind the two of them.

Behind them, Katie and Sadie walked together, and Gwen and Harold walked nearby.

"Didn't I say not to walk next to me?" the goth asked the tall, spectacled camper.

"I can't really help that our walking speeds are similar," Harold said, "You _could_ walk faster, y'know?"

"So could you."

"Oh my goodness, Katie!" Sadie said abruptly, "This is _just_ like that cancer walk that our moms made us go on!"

"I was just thinking that! It took, like, _forever_!"

"Oh, but there _was_ that cute guy who was _totally_ checking you out!"

"No, he was checking _you_ out!"

"No, he was checking _both_ of us out!"

"Eeeeeee!"

Gwen gave a long sigh and reluctantly began to jog.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Yeah, my legs won't be _thanking_ me anytime soon, but my ears _definitely_ will."

XXXXXXXXXX

Harold soon followed, his arms bent and slightly behind his torso as he ran.

XXXXXXXXXX

"I like girls as much as the next guy," Harold said, "But there's a certain frequency that their voices go to that just bugs me. It's like a sonic attack that totally depletes my hit points…"

XXXXXXXXXX

Farther back, Heather took her time, stopping to insult Owen, who had dropped to the ground, trying to lap water from a stream like a dog in an attempt to regain some of his energy. The stuck-up girl's barbs were returned back to her in full force by Leshawna who also stopped to catch her breath.

Chris chose that moment to drive past them all on a Vespa, reminding them all that if they weren't back by dinnertime, then they wouldn't eat.

In last place, Tyler, DJ and Cody all looked nervously at one another.

"We've gotta' pick it up a notch guys," DJ said, increasing his speed.

"Yeah!" Cody agreed, "By the end of today, Chef's food will probably look pretty good!"

XXXXXXXXXX

Elsewhere, the resident squirrels and birds of Camp Wawanakwa were jolted from their sleep by an unfamiliar interloper. The intruder hopped between tree branches rapidly, traversing them almost as, if not faster, than the running forms of the campers below. The cameras captured flashes of green and orange as the figure sprung through the foliage.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Chris said we had to _run_, but he never said we had to run on the _ground_…" Izzy grinned.

XXXXXXXXXX

As the day wore on, some campers who had started well began to fall behind.

Noah, in particular, was having difficulty. Eventually, the smart aleck was passed by everyone but Harold, who was having difficulty breathing, and Owen who had to stop and rest every few minutes to catch his breath.

Looking around and seeing no other runners near him, Noah shrugged and lay down on the ground, pretending to be unconscious.

"Whatever."

XXXXXXXXXX

"I'm not an athlete, in case you _couldn't_ tell. I didn't think there would be many physical challenges, considering I was under the impression that this would be taking place at a resort. Anyway, I figured that if I just played dead, someone would _carry_ me the rest of the way."

XXXXXXXXXX

"Sweet Swami of Salami!" Owen cried, upon discovering Noah's prone form, "Don't worry buddy! I'll get you back to camp!"

The stout Gopher tossed Noah over his shoulder; charging back to camp.

XXXXXXXXXX

At the same time, many campers began arriving back at camp. Eva, Justin, Geoff, Trent and Courtney were all surprised to discover that Duncan had arrived before all of them.

"How…did you _beat_ me?!" Eva demanded, slamming her fist on the table.

"Hey, chill out," Duncan said easily, "_Touchy_…"

"How _did_ you get here so fast _Duncan_?" Courtney asked, suspicion in her tone, "I didn't see you _once_ out there!"

"Hey, sweetheart, when you've got as much experience running from the law as I do; you learn to be quick about it."

XXXXXXXXXX

"Yeah right! I didn't _actually_ run that thing! I snuck off after a while and came back here. Took a nap!"

XXXXXXXXXX

"_Okay_…" the brunette frowned dubiously, going over to the coffee station to see if she couldn't find some of the invigorating bean.

Justin, Eva, and Geoff all took seats along the far table. Justin immediately lowered his head to the table, closing his eyes in exhaustion. Eva followed suit and rested her head on her chin.

Geoff, on the other hand, leaned back on his seat, putting his feet up on the table.

"Dude! How do you balance like that?" Chris asked, looking at Geoff's precarious perch with amazement.

"I took gymnastics in junior high dude. Made me really popular with the ladies, I can tell you."

Meanwhile, Trent had collapsed next to the fireplace; no longer feeling capable of standing.

"I…haven't exercised…this much…since…uh…_yesterday_!" he breathed.

A few minutes later, Gwen and Bridgette entered the cafeteria. Gwen immediately dropped to her knees, crawling towards a seat and propping her head on it.

"I'm just going to use the restroom, okay Chris?" Bridgette half asked, half told the host, not even waiting for an answer. On her way out, she passed by Izzy, who was skipping happily into camp.

"What a great workout, huh?" she said as she entered the main hall.

Everyone who was still able to move turned and glared at her.

"Bite me!" Eva snarled.

"Is that an invitation? 'Cause I'm _totally_ over my zombie phase."

"Uh…"

Before everyone could get creeped out much more, DJ, Cody and Tyler arrived; all of them dragging their feet.

"That was…_brutal_ man!" DJ wheezed.

"I need some _water_!" Tyler said, his hand at his parched throat.

"There's some over here," Courtney said, lifting up a pitcher of the clear liquid from the counter where she stood.

Tyler gulped it down gratefully, offering the pitcher to DJ and Cody, who declined and instead crumpled into some seats.

Izzy, in the meantime, had disappeared.

Katie and Sadie arrived next, the normally chatty girls too tired to talk. The pair made for the closest seats available and rested their heads on the table.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Uh! I hate running!" Katie said into the confessional, "Gym is like, my least favorite subject…"

"Mine too!" Sadie agreed, "Although our P.E. uniforms _are_ super cute!"

"_So_ fetch!"

XXXXXXXXXX

Lindsay and Beth entered soon after, both walking backwards.

"…and you can see who's behind you too! There's no downside!" Lindsay was in the middle of saying.

"Totally!"

"_See_? There's Heather!" the blonde said, pointing out the door at her teammate, who was stomping angrily up the steps to lodge.

"Chris! There had _better_ be food!" the haughty camper huffed, stepping over Lindsay, who had tripped over backwards.

"Not to worry Heather. We're just waiting on the rest of the campers to get back."

"If they don't hurry up-"

"You'll…what?" Gwen said from her resting place, "Whine them to death?"

"Speaking of death, _you_ certainly _look_ like it!"

Gwen merely sighed and rolled her eyes, not bothering with a comeback.

A lull then fell over the group for several minutes. Everyone either stared off into space, or tried to fall asleep. Chris took the opportunity to file his nails.

Without warning, the tense silence was broken when Owen burst through the door, lugging Noah over his shoulder and setting him down on a table, attempting to perform CPR on his "unconscious" fellow Gopher.

XXXXXXXXXX

"I'm _really_ glad he didn't administer mouth-to-mouth," Noah said, blanching.

XXXXXXXXXX

A relieved Leshawna was right behind them, followed by Harold, who was immediately set upon by Courtney, under the mistaken belief that he had cost them the win.

The Gophers quickly came to the conclusion that they'd won, but Chris shot them down in short order, revealing a buffet from behind a large purple curtain.

"Was that there a second ago?" Courtney asked, puzzled by the curtain's sudden appearance.

"Who _cares_?" Duncan said as he brushed by her in the headlong charge for the food.

As the campers neared the table, Izzy nearly gave them all heart attacks when she popped out from behind the table.

"Surprise!"

"Ugh! What is your _damage_ crazy girl?" Heather said, her lip curling.

"Huh? Oh that is _way_ too complicated…let's eat!"

XXXXXXXXXX

"Sorry folks," Chris interjected as the camera cut back to him, "but we can't show you the campers actually eating the buffet. Honestly, it's _pretty_ gross! _Especially_ what Owen does with the gravy! They really went to town! So, we'll pick up the action riiiiighhhhttt…now."

XXXXXXXXXX

Bridgette, having arrived late, due to her trip to the bathroom, stared longingly at the remains of the buffet.

"Well," she sighed, "at least the salad's untouched…"

"Hey, do you want one of my rolls Bridgette?" Geoff offered, looking up from his mashed potatoes.

"Um, yeah. Sure."

The few of their team members who were not distracted by food at that moment all shared knowing glances.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Okay, so Bridgette and Geoff are totally sweet on each other," Sadie said excitedly.

"Oh I _know_!" her BFFF agreed, "They would be _so_ cute together."

"Ooo, Katie! We are _such_ good matchmakers!"

"I _know_! We should start like a service or something…"

XXXXXXXXXX

"Yeah, I called that the first day," Duncan smirked, "If it's not the jocks, it's the party guys."

XXXXXXXXXX

In less than half an hour, the campers had demolished the buffet into a few meager scraps, which Chef was no doubt planning on incorporating into the next meal.

Chris then revealed that the actual challenge would be an Awake-A-Thon and that the run and the food were merely for tiring the campers out.

"Head on up to the campfire pit! That way Chef Hatchet and I can keep an eye on you to make sure you don't cheat!" he instructed after ushering them outside.

The contestants tramped into the campfire area, each taking a seat on the numerous stumps set up around the fire.

"So…what do we do now?" Beth asked.

"You sit Beth. You sit and _wait_. Boredom is just another part of this challenge," Chris said.

XXXXXXXXXX

After two hours of near silence, the sun was beginning its descent and the campers were all starting to yawn, with the exception of Duncan, who was still quite alert due to his nap.

"Okay, enough of this crap!" the teenaged ex-con said, pulling a deck of playing cards from his pocket, "Who wants to play some poker?"

"Count me in!" DJ grinned.

"Me too dude! I've got the _best_ poker face!" Geoff enthused.

Bridgette and Courtney also agreed.

Katie and Sadie were otherwise engaged in a game of rock paper scissors.

Harold, meanwhile, was organizing his Magical Steve's Magical Trading Cards™.

Tyler, on the other hand, declined outright.

"I'm not really big on games that aren't physical, you know? I'm much better at sports."

"He must be _really_ bad at cards…" DJ muttered to Geoff, who snickered.

"Should we ask Eva if she wants to play?" Bridgette wondered.

"The question is, what'll she do to you if you try to take her headphones off so she can hear you ask her?" Duncan answered.

"Good point."

"So're we using real money, or what dude?" Geoff inquired.

"What else?"

"_Oh no_," Courtney said vehemently, "I am _not_ gambling."

"Why not Princess? Is _strip_ poker more your style?" Duncan said slyly, waggling his eyebrow

"As _if_, you pig…gambling is immoral. Besides we're underage."

"And what do you suggest we use instead? _Twigs_?"

"That's actually not a bad idea," Bridgette said thoughtfully.

"Whoa, I was _joking_ there blondie!"

"Well, think about it. None of us has much more than pocket change anyway, so why don't we pool all the money we have and set it aside for a prize? Whoever gets the most wins the money."

Duncan snorted. "Okay, fine by me. What about you Princess?"

"I don't know…that still sounds a lot like gambling to me."

"Hey, if you win, you could always just give us our money back," Geoff suggested.

"Right! _If_ you win," the heavily pierced teen taunted.

"Fine. But I should warn you: I'm _really_ good at poker."

"So put your sticks where your mouth is!"

XXXXXXXXXX

Over on the Gophers' side of the fire, Cody nudged his most gluttonous teammate, who was still licking maple syrup off his face.

"Hey Owen, check out Justin!"

"What?! Why would I check out _Justin_?!" Owen said nervously, "Even if he _is_ really dreamy…I mean, he's totally handsome…I mean, _girls_ probably think that! Yeah…"

"R-right…anyway, why do you think he's standing there like that? He's not even blinking…I'd hate to get into a staring contest with that guy…"

"_I_ wouldn't mind…he has such _blue_ eyes…I mean-"

XXXXXXXXXX

Cody stared into the confession cam, his mouth slightly ajar, as if unsure what to say. He made several gestures as if he were about to say something, but decided against it.

XXXXXXXXXX

"We don't know if that's what Cody was trying to talk about," Chris shrugged, "but it _works_ right?"

XXXXXXXXXX

"How are you _doing_ this?!" Duncan demanded as Courtney laid down her hand, "_Nobody_ gets three royal flushes in a _row_! You've _got_ to be cheating!"

"Nope," Courtney smiled, as she collected her winnings and gave all them back to their respective owners, "I'm just _better_ than you at poker."

"Okay, _that's_ impossible. I've played the _best_ in juvie!"

"Well you _clearly_ need to raise your standards."

XXXXXXXXXX

"I know gambling is wrong, but I definitely enjoyed beating Duncan like that," Courtney smirked into the confession cam.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Who taught you how to play?!"

"My dad. He used to play a lot before he got a _real_ job."

"Oh, let me _guess_: Daddy's little rich girl watched while he played his buddies huh?" Duncan sneered.

"Hey! My family is _not_-"

"Listen up maggots!" Chef shouted, interrupting the former CIT.

"I've gotcha' dinna' right here," he said, indicating a cart full of bowls filled with a lumpy substance and 21 bottled waters, "It's my turn to watch you hooligans while Chris goes off and eats his own dinna'. Once yer done with ya' food, you _will_ shut'cha pie holes and quit'cher rough housin'! I ain't as _lenient_ as Chris."

The perpetually grumpy man finished with a growl, setting up a folding chair and taking out a portable TV and headphones.

"Oh! And so _help_ me, if _any_ of you interrupt my stories, I will put my _boot_ up ya' butt _so_ far, you'll need a brain surgeon to take it out!"

"Uh, the colon's not connected to the _brain_, genius…" Noah muttered, most unwisely.

In two seconds flat, he had a large and furious ex-military man staring him in the face.

"You wanna' keep testin' me boy?!" Chef rumbled, "I'll remind you that I _control_ what goes in ya' food…and ya' gotta' eat _sometime_…Now if you'll _excuse_ me, I gotta' go find out if Josephine is gettin' back together with Kenneth! That poor boy…"

XXXXXXXXXX

"That hussy Rosemary _stole_ his innocence! He and Josephine were so good together! Damn you Rosemary and your wiles!"

XXXXXXXXXX

Several hours (and some juicy twists) later, the campers were almost relieved to see Chris walking up the path.

Their permanently bestubbled host tapped Chef on the shoulder to let him know he was there.

"_What_?!" the large man said as he rounded on Chris, his eyes uncharacteristically moist.

"Dude…are you _crying_?"

"No! I-I got some…_ash_ in my eye. From the fire," he lied unconvincingly, as he tried to collect himself.

"Sure…" Chris grinned.

"Yeah, yeah! Laugh it up pretty boy!" Chef snarled, grabbing him by the collar, "But know _this_: if you interrupt me while I'm watching _The Gallant and The Gorgeous _again, I will _end_ you."

"Yeesh…dude likes his soaps…" Chris muttered, taking Chef's now vacant seat.

"And where have _you_ been for the past five hours?" Leshawna frowned indignantly, "Chef said you were havin' dinner…"

"I _did_…but, after that, I decided to get a massage. Then I had a little nap. How about you guys? What's new huh?"

The silence that followed could've shattered eardrums.

XXXXXXXXXX

"If that man wasn't in charge of handing out a million bucks, I probably would've _strangled_ him," Eva said, speaking for nearly everyone.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Chatty aren'tcha?" Chris said, raising an eyebrow and settling in with the latest issue of Star Stalker magazine.

20 sets of eyes bored into the trashy magazine, while its holder read up on the latest gossip.

Justin's eyes, meanwhile, were seemingly wide and unblinking.

XXXXXXXXXX

"I learned how to sleep standing up during a modeling gig a while back," the bronze-skinned hunk clarified, "The only hard part was finding the paint for my eyes…"

XXXXXXXXXX

"How about another round of poker?" DJ suggested.

"Yeah!" Harold said brightly, "You guys should've told me you were playing!"

"Ah-ah-ah!" Chris wagged his finger sternly, looking up from Star Stalker, "No more poker! It's _too_ interesting!"

The Bass grumbled as Duncan sullenly tossed the pack of cards to him.

A silence fell over the team, while on the Gophers' side of the fire, Trent attempted to strike up a conversation with Gwen.

"So you entered this thing on a dare huh?"

"Yeah, from my little brother no less…"

"Hey that's not so bad. Sometimes I wish I had a brother…"

"No, you don't. _Trust_ me."

XXXXXXXXXX

"Don't get me wrong though," Gwen amended, "He's _alright_…but if I'd have known that I'd have to do this kind of stuff, I would've _smacked_ him! And I _will_, as soon as they vote me off and send me home. Which'll probably be any day now…"

XXXXXXXXXX

"I don't know. I think it'd be kind of nice to have somebody to help me deal with all my parents' craziness," Trent said.

"I guess I can see that. With my dad gone, my mom's gotten really clingy, so I'm definitely glad I'm not the only target of her affections…"

"_Target_ huh? Something tells me red and white aren't your colors…"

A giggle escaped Gwen's lips, causing her to look away in embarrassment.

XXXXXXXXXX

"_Why_ did I _laugh_ at that?!" Gwen questioned the camera, "It wasn't _funny_! Although…no! _No_!"

XXXXXXXXXX

After this revelation, Gwen gave Trent the silent treatment; partly out of embarrassment and partly out of misplaced anger.

Around 4 a.m., the campers' yawns became larger and longer.

Owen, meanwhile, slipped off his seat, striking his chin on the ground.

"I'm awake!" he shouted, hurrying to his feet.

The gluttonous camper then began pacing back and forth in an effort to remain conscious.

However, he soon ran out of energy.

"Woo hoo! Stay awake for twelve hours? I can do that in my sleep! Woo hoo!" Owen said hysterically, as Chris announced the time that had elapsed since the Awake-A-Thon's inception. The rotund camper promptly keeled over and slipped into a tryptophan-induced coma.

"This is the most boring thing I've _ever_ done in my life," Gwen stated, her arms hanging limp at her sides.

"Could be way worse," Trent said, yawning.

"Oh yeah? _How_?"

"I could be stuck here without you to talk to," the dark-haired musician grinned.

Gwen turned her head and smiled, despite her earlier discomfort.

XXXXXXXXXX

"That was a _really_ dorky line," she said into the confessional, smirking slightly.

XXXXXXXXXX

While Heather called Lindsay and Beth over to talk them both into forming their infamous alliance, the Killer Bass were discussing Owen's elimination from the game.

"Alright guys," Geoff said, still managing to be upbeat despite their exhaustion, "The big dude's out! That means we're in the lead!"

"Actually, it doesn't," Courtney corrected him, "We started with one player short. We're just tied now."

"Oh. _Bummer_…"

"Don't worry. Our team's way tougher than theirs," Tyler said confidently, reclining against his stump and looking out at the lake.

"Yeah," Eva agreed, taking a rare opportunity to join in the conversation, "I don't think they're much competition…except for that pretty guy who's just _standing_ there. That takes _discipline_."

"I don't know…" Courtney frowned, "That Heather girl seems really determi-…What are you _doing_?"

"What?" Tyler said, startled, "I wasn't doing anything!"

"Yes, you were. You were waving at that blonde girl, weren't you?"

"So what? I like her."

"_So_ _what_? You _can't_ like her! She's on the other _team_. It's like fraternizing with the enemy."

XXXXXXXXXX

"I don't care what _anybody_ says. Boy meets girl is romantic," DJ said firmly.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Who's she kidding?" Duncan shook his head, "The jock and the bimbo? That's a match made in heaven. Or, y'know, somewhere more preppy and lame…"

XXXXXXXXXX

Courtney looked to her teammates, hoping to find someone who would support her argument and, finding none, settled on ignoring them.

Struck by a sudden idea, she started moving her arms and legs in place.

"Practicing for another marathon, Princess?" Duncan called from his stump.

"Not _exactly_," the freckled girl said smugly, "If I keep moving, I'm sure I can outlast those Gophers. You should _all_ join in. We'll win for sure!"

"Oh _yeah_," the delinquent scoffed, "That'll help. Didn't you _see_ Tons of Fun drop like a stone a while back?"

"You're only going to tire yourself out Courtney," Bridgette agreed, stifling a yawn.

"We'll _see_…" the former counselor in training replied stubbornly.

Meanwhile, Eva excused herself to use the bathroom, dropping her mp3 player as she left; eliciting a sneaky maneuver by Heather, whose manipulation skills went into overdrive.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Eva and a lot of the other Bass are much better at physical challenges then we are. If I can turn her against her own team, there's no way they'll keep her around. And the playing field for the challenges will be a _lot_ more even…"

XXXXXXXXXX

Naturally, upon Eva's return she was rather furious.

"Where is it?!" the frightening camper roared; startling every living thing in a twenty kilometer radius.

"Hey!" Chris said, nursing his ears, "Try to keep the noise to a _minimum_ people! I just had a nap!"

The campers all shot him dirty looks; angered by his perennial tactlessness.

Dropping her voice, Eva muttered angrily to her teammates, "My mp3 player! It's gone!"

"Did you check the bathroom?" Bridgette suggested, "Maybe it slipped out of your pocket or something."

"Oh, you'd like that wouldn't you! My stuff on that nasty bathroom floor?!"

"Uh, no…"

XXXXXXXXXX

"I get the feeling Eva doesn't like me very much…"

XXXXXXXXXX

"I don't like her. She's _too_ helpful. And I don't trust _anyone_ who thinks surfing is a sport!"

XXXXXXXXXX

After questioning all her teammates, Eva made for the other team, only to have Chris confine her to her seat; barring any future bathroom visits.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Sure, I like that Eva likes to shake things up, but I don't think our legal department would like it if one camper ended up beating the other team half to death. Even if _would_ be good TV…"

XXXXXXXXXX

"There's no question about me outlasting them all now," Eva said into the camera, a veritable fire in her eyes, "I'm just _waiting _to get _even_. And whoever stole it, is going to _PAY_!"

XXXXXXXXXX

As the morning wore on, many campers began to feel gravity's pull on their eyelids.

Katie and Sadie were the next to go, their heads nearly colliding as the pair's chins slipped farther down their perches on their hands.

When the sun reached its zenith, Noah began to waver, swaying slightly as the warm light lulled him into unconsciousness.

Toppling off his stump, he was jarred awake momentarily; before looking around tiredly and shrugging, propping his head up on his hand.

XXXXXXXXXX

"I really didn't see the point. We had the advantage and I was tired."

XXXXXXXXXX

Later that afternoon, Bridgette began to nod off.

Geoff, seeing this, shook her awake.

"You've gotta' stay awake Bridgette! Think of something exciting! Like uh…surfing!"

"Right," the blonde surfer murmured sleepily, "Surfing. Waves. Gentle, gentle waves…"

Sliding off her seat, she was out like a light.

"No! Brihihihidgette!" Geoff said despairingly, amid fighting off a yawn.

"Are you _crying_?" Eva asked, her lip curling in derision.

"What? No! 'Cha right! Geeze…" Geoff scoffed, wiping his eyes, "Just yawning bra."

XXXXXXXXXX

"I wasn't! I swear dudes! It's on, like…_film_, right?"

XXXXXXXXXX

In the early evening, Chef got the fire going again, as it had gone out while he and Chris were trading shifts.

As the flames flickered back to life, the entrancing blaze lulled two sets of eyes into submission.

Katie and Sadie both began snoring softly as their chins dipped forward.

DJ nudged Duncan, commenting, "Looks like we're down another two, man! We'll never win at this rate…"

"Huh?" the mohawked teen said vaguely, tearing his eyes away from Courtney, who was walking in place directly in front of him, "Oh yeah, that sucks."

Tired as he was, DJ could see his friend was preoccupied.

"Uh _huh_…"

XXXXXXXXXX

"Dude's got it _bad_!"

XXXXXXXXXX

"You know, with all the great, uh…_scenery_…around here, I don't think I'll sleep a wink," Duncan told the camera, chuckling pervertedly.

XXXXXXXXXX

On the Gophers' side of the fire, Izzy was fighting a losing battle with oblivion. Rocking back and forth, the wily redhead was muttering to herself; causing her teammates to give her a slight berth.

"Nnnn…never get me! Unnn…squirrels…bushy…Zzzzz…"

This drew nervous glances from her teammates, who all watched her uneasily as she slipped off her seat and began to kick the air in her sleep.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Oh I would've totally made it all the way end!" Izzy exclaimed into the confessional much later, "Except, I got into a totally huge fight with this squirrel army when we were doing that run thing earlier. Yeah…pretty intense…"

XXXXXXXXXX

"We here at Total Drama cannot confirm or _deny_ Izzy's story," Chris said, "However, we can show you this…"

XXXXXXXXXX

The camera cut to earlier in the day, revealing an orange and green blur flitting through the trees.

"Oh _crap_!" the man behind the camera shouted suddenly, dropping the camera, which remained rolling.

The cameraman's legs ran across the screen, while his voice called out, "Oh God! Get them off me! _Get them off me_!"

The only sounds that followed were a maniacal cackling laugh, the clang of metal, and dozens upon dozens of violent squeaks.

XXXXXXXXXX

Leshawna stared at the unconscious jungle girl on the ground and muttered, "Is it just me or is that girl-?"

"Oh, she's nuts," Gwen affirmed.

"Psycho hose beast…" Heather sneered.

The other Gophers nodded.

"Just checkin'."

"If anyone else is crazy, now would be the time to speak up," Gwen drawled.

"Not unless you mean crazy for _love_…" Cody grinned, "_Ladies_…"

The goth rolled her eyes, while Lindsay giggled, "Oh Caleb, you're so silly!"

"Well, I wouldn't say I'm crazy either," Trent said, "Although my mom says that I put too much stock in luck if I'm really nervous about something…"

"That's kinda' weird," Gwen chuckled.

"Hey, I bet you'd put nine rabbits' feet in your backpack too if you wanted to pass a test bad enough."

"Uh huh…_sure_…"

XXXXXXXXXX

Later on in the evening, as the twenty-four hour mark approached, Tyler's eyes which were pointed at Katie and Sadie's sleeping forms, began to close.

Soon after, the excitable jock awoke screaming, having thought he saw the two BFFs eaten by a bear.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Heheh, yeah," Chris laughed, "We actually got Tyler, Katie and Sadie to record Tyler's dream sequence after that. Cool huh? I think it really gives a nice insight into who our contestants are as people. Plus, did you see how hard the bear smacked those girls! Ha! And Tyler's face! Classic! 'Course we used the trained bear…well, the _more_ trained one…Oh, and we did the same thing with Cody's dream too."

XXXXXXXXXX

After Chris attempted to bore the campers into submission with his selection of "Ye Olde Faerie Tales for the Unimaginative," the host decided to change tactics.

"Chef! You know what this means, don't you?"

"I know, I know…" Hatchet grumbled, putting down his harp and unzipping his sheep costume to reveal a ballerina outfit.

This drew snickers from all around the campfire, including a derisive wolf whistle from Duncan.

"Oh, you think this is funny do ya'?!" the disgruntled cook shouted, "Well, just so ya'll know: diarrhea ain't always an accident! Got me?!"

This shut most of the campers up.

"Chef Tutu! Would you kindly distribute the 'magic dust,' please?"

Executing some surprisingly graceful dance moves, the ex-military man pranced in front of both teams, throwing a low-grade sleeping powder on them all.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Well, excuse me for bein' dedicated to ma' job! Pirouettes ain't easy ya' know!"

XXXXXXXXXX

"Ah!" DJ cried, as his eyelids began to sink, "It's gettin' ta' me you guys! What do I do?!"

"You should tie yourself to a tree dude!" Geoff suggested, "You can't sleep standing up, right?"

"Actually," Harold spoke up, "Cows and other members of the bovine family-"

"Nobody cares, geek-wad," Duncan interrupted him, "What're you gonna' use for rope? I could probably go off and snag some, but I'm not in exactly in prime stealing mode right now…"

"Here, use my bandages," Tyler said, throwing the wrappings to DJ, "I think my wrist's mostly fine anyway. Eva didn't hurt me too bad."

Despite his claim, he cradled his wrist slightly.

"Wow, thanks Ty! I owe ya' one buddy," DJ said gratefully, running over to the nearest tree.

Seeing this, Chris muttered to his ballerina-like cohort, "You know what to do…"

The graceful giant had soon sprinkled all the powder he had left onto the tree bound teen, knocking him out and taking the tree with him.

"Oh no!" Courtney said, chewing her nail anxiously, while maintaining her constant shuffling, "We're down by two now!"

"Who cares?" Eva scoffed, "I'll outlast all of them, and all of you, if it comes down to it. There's no way we're losing this challenge!"

XXXXXXXXXX

"If we lose, Eva's gotta' go man," Geoff said into the camera, yawning and scratching his head, "She's totally bringing the whole team down and that's…that's not…that's…bad news…bro…"

XXXXXXXXXX

One of the cameramen discovered Geoff asleep in the confessional and, along with another crew member, dragged his unconscious form back to the campfire.

"Gee, at the rate they're dropping, this'll be over by morning," Gwen said, as she and Trent watched the crew prop the camp's resident partier up in his seat.

"Oh, I don't know about that Gwen," Trent replied in his best announcer voice, "I like Eva's chances. She's mean, she's lean, and it'd probably take a dinosaur to bring her down. I wouldn't underestimate her."

Chuckling, Gwen decided to play along. "And what would you recommend the other team do against such an unstoppable opponent, Trent?"

"Well Gwen, it's my professional opinion, that the Gophers stay awake through stimulating conversation," Trent said, grinning cheesily and giving a false chuckle so often favored by announcers.

"You're kind of a dork, aren't you?"

"Is that a bad thing?"

The teal-accented goth shrugged noncommittally, looking into the fire.

XXXXXXXXXX

"At least he doesn't care too much about what people think of him…" she said into the confession cam, a smile playing on her lips.

XXXXXXXXXX

"I hope she doesn't think I'm a dweeb now!" Trent confessed worriedly.

XXXXXXXXXX

Within the next few hours, both Tyler and Leshawna slumped forward onto their hands in slumber, followed soon after by Harold.

XXXXXXXXXX

"There's just something about staring across a fire into the eyes of a beautiful girl…it just seems magical…" Harold murmured fervently, before realizing what he'd just said, "Oh wait, I mean-"

XXXXXXXXXX

Soon after the forty hour mark, Lindsay and Beth both succumbed to the lord of forty winks and passed right out in their seats, leaving Heather to stay awake alone.

Looking around at her remaining teammates, she found little in the way of possible support. Gwen and Trent were engaged in discussing their favorite everything, Justin was even more statuesque than usual, and Cody was busy pretending not to look at the back of Gwen's head.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Ugh," the master manipulator sighed, "Chess is a lot easier if you have pawns. At least, my dad told me so. He tried to get me to play once, but checkered colors are _so_ lumberjack…"

XXXXXXXXXX

Meanwhile, the Gophers' tubbiest member had disrobed and walked across the campfire area, arms extended and snoring.

The campers and Chris all froze, watching with disgusted fascination as Owen walked off into the woods au natural.

XXXXXXXXXX

"I don't know what's more disturbing," Cody said, closing his eyes and attempting to burn the mental image of Owen's private areas from his brain, "The fact that he took his clothes off while he was asleep, or the fact that all of us were too t-tired to notice…"

XXXXXXXXXX

Much like Geoff, the cameramen found Cody fast asleep in the confession stall.

After they'd carried him back to camp, they were about to set him down on his seat, when Chris stopped them. Giggling madly, he whispered something to Chef Hatchet, who was just coming to replace him.

Grinning in an equally devious way, the large cook took the geeky camper and set him down directly next to a softly snoring Noah.

Duncan didn't even bother attempting to hide his sniggers.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Those two are never gonna' live that down! Aw, Chris is sick…"

XXXXXXXXXX

Night turned into day and the campers who were already asleep slept on.

"Er…how strong was that sleeping powder we used?" Chris muttered to Chef Hatchet.

His ex-military flunky shrugged, going back to watching the latest episode of his soap.

As night approached once again, Courtney's legs finally gave out on her and the brunette collapsed to the ground.

"I'll…I'll just rest my eyes for a minute…" she mumbled, dozing off.

XXXXXXXXXX

"I did not fall asleep! I _demand_ to see the tapes!" the furious ex-CIT pouted later.

XXXXXXXXXX

Despite their efforts to stay awake by looking at constellations, Trent and Gwen found that turning their attention to things closer to Earth helped them keep more alert.

Their examination of Justin's uncanny stillness revealed the male model's painted lids, leaving Chris no choice but to disqualify him.

"What was _that_?!" Heather hissed at Trent and Gwen, who turned to look blearily puzzled at her.

"I'm sorry?" the male half of the pair asked, scratching his head and yawning widely.

"You just made Justin get eliminated! Now we don't have as much of an advantage. We could lose the _challenge_ because of you two!"

"So?" Gwen shrugged, "We still have a lead. Plus, we were just trying to stay awake. And it's not like you're a bundle of interesting."

"Oh, I'm not interesting? I can't keep you awake?!" Heather glared, "Well, how's this for keeping you awake…"

XXXXXXXXXX

"Yeah…" Chris drawled, frowning slightly, "Heather spent most of the next thirty hours being a little b-"

He looked off camera at someone. "What? I can't say that on TV? Fine! Heather was really annoying for like, over a day! There's a reason we didn't show it the first time, and that's still true. No one wants to see that."

XXXXXXXXXX

Eventually however, the bossy queen of Wawanakwa's throat became tired and she let up.

In the interim time however, Duncan had found ways to keep himself entertained.

He started by giving his escort the slip on one of his bathroom breaks. Sneaking into the guys' side of the Bass cabin, he carefully removed all of Harold's underwear with a stick.

XXXXXXXXXX

"No way I was gonna' touch those things with my hands!"

XXXXXXXXXX

Next, he hid them all throughout the campgrounds, even throwing a few into the girls' cabins.

His final measure was to dip Harold's hand in water, causing the green-eyed nerd to dream of wetter things, and consequently, soil his current pair of underwear.

"Oh gross, it works! Dude peed his pants!" the prankster exulted, pointing and laughing at his target.

Awoken by the sound of his voice, Harold soon noticed his predicament and covered himself, looking desperately around for Chris, who he knew wouldn't allow him to leave without permission.

XXXXXXXXXX

"See, I didn't know if he'd actually do it, but I thought that if he did, making him hunt down his underwear would be the perfect icing on the cake."

XXXXXXXXXX

Across the pit, Cody and Noah had their _special_ awakening; resulting in them both screaming and running in opposite directions.

XXXXXXXXXX

Noah stared into the camera, fidgeting and biting his nails.

"It didn't happen! It didn't happen!"

XXXXXXXXXX

Cody was a bit more levelheaded.

"Heh heh…okay…this, this isn't _so_ bad…I mean, the ladies like gay guys right? Not that I'm gay! I'm not!"

XXXXXXXXXX

The rest of the teams gradually awoke, with Tyler going over to untie DJ from where he still lay tied to the tree.

Finally, Chris approached the camp, dismissing everyone, for which they were all grateful, especially Harold, who had been none too subtly covering his stain.

So, while the campers still participating in the Awake-A-Thon were being bored into submission by Chris's recitation of Canada's history, the contestants who had already lost made their way to the showers.

Harold, on the other hand, was having very little luck in finding a replacement pair of undergarments.

"What the heck! Gosh!" the lanky geek fumed on the Bass cabin's patio.

"Ewww!" a girlish scream sounded from the girls' side and the door was thrown open, soon followed by a pair of briefs.

"Hey!" Harold frowned, picking up his lost gitch, "What were they doing in there?"

Sighing, he shifted his bathing suit, which he had put on until he could put his soiled clothing through the wash.

XXXXXXXXXX

Back at the campfire, Chris's lecture had managed to down three more contestants, leaving Gwen and Duncan the last two sleepless competitors.

Trent, Heather and Eva were shaken awake and told that they'd have to go back to their bunks to go to sleep.

This drew bloodshot glares from the trio and a swift left hook from Eva, leaving the crewman unconscious on the ground and missing a tooth.

"Great!" Chris groused, slapping his palm to his forehead, "More of the budget blown on painkillers!"

XXXXXXXXXX

"Okay, I know people getting hurt is great for ratings, but we spend a lot of moola on painkillers. Seriously."

XXXXXXXXXX

Trent returned to his bunk and didn't get up again for the next fourteen hours.

Eva went looking for her mp3 player, while Heather took her time taking a shower, allowing the belligerent bodybuilder time to rage at her teammates before "discovering" the lost device and handing it over.

The Awake-A-Thon itself was soon over, as Duncan fell asleep on the toilet and Gwen collapsed soon after; making the Screaming Gophers the victors of the four day long challenge.

Meanwhile, back the Bass cabin, the losing team began discussing their options, upon learning of Duncan's loss.

"I suppose it's a blessing in disguise…" Bridgette murmured to Courtney and Katie, as they watched Eva loading all of their things back into the cabin.

"What do you mean? We _lost_. _Again_! And we were _already_ at a disadvantage," Courtney said desperately.

"Well, this way we can vote Eva out."

"I dunno' you guys…" Katie reasoned, "She is one of our strongest people. She's been real helpful in all our physical challenges."

"But what if she goes off the chain like this _during_ a challenge," Bridgette retorted, "She needs some serious anger management classes."

"Yeah, no kidding," Courtney agreed, glancing at Eva out of the corner of her eye. The muscled girl had a forced smile on her face as she went about trying to rectify the effects of her outburst. The act of smiling appeared to cause her great pain and her eyes was twitching furiously.

"It's the last straw," the CIT continued, "First we're run half to death, deprived of sleep and food, and now all of our stuff is covered in dirt! She _has_ to go."

Katie nodded, conceding the point. "I'll tell Sadie when she gets out of her shower."

"Ohhhh," Bridgette said in realization, "_That's_ what's so different about you. It was so _weird_ seeing you without Sadie, but I couldn't put my finger on it."

"Hey we do stuff without each other!"

"Like what?"

"Um…shower…and uh…let's see…"

XXXXXXXXXX

"It was a hard question!"

XXXXXXXXXX

Dinner that night was a tense affair for the Bass, as everyone shot Eva angry looks, while she avoided their gazes guiltily, listening to her mp3 player.

The lone exception was Duncan, although that was mainly because he had his face pointed at the table; fast asleep.

When Chris called them all out to vote in the confessional, Geoff and DJ heaved the exhausted delinquent to his feet.

"C'mon man, we gotta' vote," DJ urged him.

"Screw it," Duncan mumbled, burying his face in the crook of his arm as he was dragged towards the confessional.

DJ and Geoff shared a glance.

"Look, we didn't want to tell you this 'til later dude, but…"

"But…" Duncan raised his unibrow, not the least bit interested.

"Eva broke your sunglasses dude."

"She _WHAT_?!"

XXXXXXXXXX

"Eva's gone!" the mohawked teen said furiously, scribbling down her name on a slip of paper and stuffing it into the ballet box.

XXXXXXXXXX

Similarly, the rest of the Bass voted for Eva, all irked at her rage-a-holic attitude or the destruction and/or soiling of one of their personal items; with the exception of Eva herself, of course.

XXXXXXXXXX

"That scrawny kid, Harold, needs to go. He couldn't pull his own weight in the run today and he won't help us win any challenges."

XXXXXXXXXX

Chris then announced the elimination, surprising no one but Eva, and even then, not very much.

This didn't stop her from being exceedingly angry, however, and she took out some of it on Chris's shin.

As the fuming former contestant made her way down to the docks, the Bass were surprised to see Justin approaching the campfire.

"Uh, sorry to interrupt, but I think I left my moisturizer out here…"

"Oh, I was wondering whose this was," their host said, reluctantly handing it over, "That's a nice brand man. I use it myself."

"It shows."

Snorting tiredly, Duncan muttered, "Wow, feminine much?"

His statement fell on deaf ears, as Katie and Sadie were too busy admiring the hunk's features in the firelight and the rest of the Bass were waving Eva off, some with a little more satisfaction than others.

"Buh-bye Eva!" Courtney called after her retreating back.

Much to the CIT's surprise, her comment provoked Eva into lobbing a sharpened stick in her direction, embedding itself into a pole directly where her head had just been located.

"Touchy!"

Bidding goodnight to Justin, the Bass toasted their marshmallows; vowing not to lose again the next week.

XXXXXXXXXX

Upon arriving at Playa Des Losers, Eva was greeted by Ezekiel, who ran up to give her a high five, which he had recently learned how to do. She stared at his hand until he put it down.

"How's it going eh? N-no hard feelings about last time, r-right?"

Eying him speculatively with her usual frown, Eva growled, "Not if you tell me where the food is…"

"D-down the hall! I can show you, I was actually on my way there myself. It's something called a buffet, which means-"

"I _know_ what means. And don't walk next to me."

"Sure thing, eh."

XXXXXXXXXX

"Thanks for joining us for this very special, extra-long episode," Chris told the camera, looking up from counting a large stack of money, "We hope you enjoyed the campers' attempts to stay awake much more than they did. But as you all know, they won't have long to rest, especially since Harold snores like a chainsaw! Tune in next time for some dodge-tastic Total _Drama_ Outtakes!"

He looked off camera, frowning and scratching his head. "Can we edit out 'dodge-tastic? I don't think that's a word…"

XXXXXXXXXX

**Author's Note**:

Hey, sorry about the HUGE gap between updates people. I've been more focused on my other big story and getting through its first major arc. I'll be focusing on FtCRF more often from now on, between school and trying to find a job, of course. The next few chapters should be much shorter, and thus, come out sooner, as they won't take place over several days like this one did.

By the way, do you think Total Drama Outtakes is a more appropriate title for this story? I'm partial to the current one, but changing the title might attract more readers, who don't necessarily read beyond a story's title. Whaddayathink?

Also, I've started displaying the progress of my stories on my profile, so you can see how far along I am, or at least a rough estimate.


End file.
